Westside on the Eastside

Heads or Tails

2007-04-10T16:46:00.000-04:00

Today I proved that odds are in favour of the flipper, (as opposed to the caller...not the flippee.) I know what you're thinking: the odds of flipping a coin are 50-50, right?

Wrong!

Let me explain. There are three ways that a coin can land when you flip it: Heads, Tails, or on it's edge. Today I flipped a coin to decide if I was going to make an afternoon Starbucks run. Heads I go, Tails I don't. It came to rest up on it's edge. No kidding! Of course now I was faced with the paradox of neither going nor not going to Starbucks, (follow that?) I instead took it to mean I should make my own decision and not leave it to chance, so I went. Anyway, what this incredible event proved is that it's not 50-50 when you flip a coin. It's more like 49.[some long string of 9's] Heads vs. the same Tails, and some very small fraction left over for the edge. Really though, when something like that happens, who doesn't try to do it again immediately? I flipped the coin two more times and it came up Heads both times, so what I really proved today is that when you flip a coin, two thirds of the time it will come up Heads, and the other third it will land on it's edge.

Hey, like the government and TV execs, I can make stats say anything I want.

If fact, tonight I'm going to prove that 100% of Kevin's prefer Dairy Queen to the gym on Tuesdays.

All for now,
Kef...

Wrapping up Winter

2007-04-01T13:31:00.000-04:00

Well, it was a hard fought battle but our team couldn't pull through for the win on Friday, so that means another curling season is pretty much in the books. The other team still has a game on Monday that might be worth some cash but that'll be it. All the snow around here is gone, even the giant mall parking lot piles, and today it is raining which is good because it gets most of the crummy winter salt off the road. Winter truly is over, which gets me thinking about this summer.

I've had the 'spring' jacket on for a while, (even for a few days that probably were too cold.) I pulled out the carpet car mats and they're ready to go in. I ran outside for the first time this past week; I've been on the treadmill all winter. I put the bike back together a while back, (I was hopeful,) including the new aero bars I got a Christmas. I bought myself a race wetsuit that I am dying to try. Then I started looking at my calendar...

Yeah, if you want to do anything with me on any weekend over the summer, you'd better let me know now.

The first thing I did was put all the races from the Subaru series in. Eleven races in total, but I hope to hit nine of them. I actually did this a ways back to work out the training schedule, but this is the first time I've tried to see how the rest of the summer shaped up. Next I put in the weddings. The Roomy and Ang, Boomer and Ryguy, Crustina and Andrew, (yeah, he doesn't have a nickname.) Plus my cousin but that isn't until October. Four weddings...not like I haven't done that before. (Just no funeral, please.) Next was the camping weekends. I think there is only one for sure but maybe I can squeeze in a couple more. Also, I think I am going back to baseball this year. Chucky asked me to play on the Wishing Well men's team this year so that should be fun. There's the weekend away with the Youth Leaders... Ugh, I haven't even figured out when I am going to golf yet, plus I have to move at some point. I can see September coming and I won't even know how it got here.

Anyway, I think the point was that I am excited about this next season and how it's going to unfold. I'm sure over the next couple of weeks there will be even more that I will have to shoehorn into the calendar but it always seems to work out.

Now I just have to pray that we don't get the one last Easter snow storm for which the TDot is famous.

All for now,
Kef...

Stupid FREAKIN' iTunes!

2007-03-27T00:19:00.000-04:00

I have a complaint.

"You take three months away from blogging and you come back with complaints?" the tens and tens of my readers ask.

Yes...deal.

I think one of THE dumbest, most ridonkulous things a piece of software can do, is access the internet using an already open browser window. What if I am doing something important in that browser window? What if I am writing on my blog? What if I am writing an email? A long email. One that has taken a lot of thought and time in collecting my thoughts and editing them into comprehensible sentences.

I am especially angry at iTunes right now. In fact, Apple in general. I had even (briefly) considered buying a Mac next time compy blows up... NO MORE!!

Let me set it up for you. I was writing an email to a friend on my hotmail account. Yes, I use hotmail, I have always used hotmail, I will always use hotmail because there is nothing more frustrating than trying to make sure everyone knows your new email address. Anyway, writing an email. A long one. To put it in perspective, it had been about 45 minutes. Suddenly, the music I've been listening to stops and I take the opportunity to put in the new CD I got today. iTunes doesn't show the CD for me to play it. This didn't truly surprise me with all the copyright blah blah blah. I wondered if I was missing something though so I tried to get some help. Apparently iTunes help is web based because the option I selected brought up the email I had been working on and proceeded to go to a new page.

AHHH! NO! STOP BROWSER! BACK BUTTON! Son of a... (I think I truly did stop here, I'll have to ask the Roomy.)

The email was gone. First person that says I should save my work as I go...I take their space bar! I was so mad I hit the close button on iTunes immediately. The dang program started up again. What the... I hit close again. Starts up again. "Give me a break!" (may have yelled this) I hit close one more time. The freakin' iTunes program starts up again... "SCREW OFF!!" (This, I know I yelled.) The next thing I did may have been a little irrational, but I had been in a bad mood for most of the day and we had lost our curling match earlier in the evening. I proceeded to hit CTRL-ALT-DEL about 37 times...hard.

Yes, I gave my compy the Three Finger Salute, usually only reserved for such special occasions as the Blue Screen of Death. It's ok, it has recovered enough for me to tell you all about it here. Man I hate Mondays sometimes.

I hope I have the Tuesdays tomorrow...

All for now,
Kef...

Only the good die young

2007-03-25T13:53:00.000-04:00

Well, I guess it happens to the best of us. I haven't been on here in ages, but I figured it was time to make a little update. That little update happened over on the Blogger profile side of things. I am no longer a 20-something. That's right, as of Friday I have officially complete my third decade of life and am now the big 3-0. Really, I don't feel any different, despite all the ribbing I've been getting about it. I think the good part is that I am not the first of my close friends by far to go through this. My Sis of course says she can't talk to me again until she gets there... I wonder if I can hold her to that? (haha, just kidding krispy!)

Something a little more exciting than me getting older is the fact that today was Youth Sunday at our church. This is when the Youth groups (SWAT for high school and Area 51 for Jr High,) take over the morning service. Today the SWAT band did all the music, (they rock!) Well, almost all the music. The band made up of completely students is so good that none of us leaders have to help, so we got together and did our own song. It was cool to get up there with Boomer, Ems and Chucky...it feels like so long since we've done it. The Roomy got some people to participate in some of the games that he does at a typical Area 51 gathering. For example: Vegatabowling! He sets up golf tees like bowling pins on one end of a table and someone stands at the other end and spits a brussel sprout out of their mouth to knock them down... Yeah, Narsty! Anyway, then he gave a great talk in place of one of the regular pastors, (not that their talks aren't great, too...) and then we ate pizza! In fact most of the guys are probably still there playing Settlers. I couldn't stay because today is the first day of curling playoffs. Speaking of which, I should be off.

I drive a lot slower now, you know...

All for now,
Kef...

That is the night before the Christmas

2006-12-27T00:34:00.000-05:00

You may remember my slightly strange activity that I call retransing, which is using an online translator to translate into, and back from a foreign language in order to create something funny, (or just completely random.) I am at it again.

In the spirit of the Holiday, I present to you, A Visit from St. Nick.

That is the night before the Christmas, passing by the house completely because the mouse is not made equal, you stirred any creative things which are not,

The stocking caught with the smokestack of worry of the desire that, St. Nicholas directly is there,

As for offering/accompanying with their beds as for range of vision of the candy it danced with the head, but you drew close entirely securely

And for napping the long winter, it solved mamma of her handkerchief, and I of my hats exactly,

When with the lawn that kind of the sound which is said shakily happening there, as for problem those which are in order to see I leapt from the bed.

I like the flash flew in the window, pulled the shutter which was opened and tore, and threw on the sash.

Month of chest of snow which was dropped newly gave the gloss of noon to purpose next

The miniature sleigh, and the reindeer of 8 minimum something to the eyes which are thought in my doubt should appear, the time

The small old operator and, therefore and it was fast actively, I had known when that becomes St. Nick,

Quicker that coursers than ãƒ¯ã‚· it came, he blew called the whistle, shouted, and those with appointing;

"Now, Dasher! Now, the dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen! Comet! Cupid! Donder and Blitzen!

On porch! On wall! The current dash which leaves! Dash! Be mixed up do everything!

When meeting to the leaf and the obstacle which "it flies before the hurricane of the wildness and dries,

So it threw as a mount to the sky to house-top, coursers of toy and complete sleigh of St. Nicholas.

And next, with glitter, I inquired about prancing and pawing of the hoof where each is small with the roof.

That I pulled by my hand, turned simultaneously, Nicholas came with the limit under saint of the smokestack.

As for him, the clothes to that feet from that head of all furs as for arrival and that clothing all ashes and the smut it changed color;

He threw with that, and depending upon him like the fair entrance of the itinerant merchant the bundle of the toy where that pack is visible.

Whether -- those shone or, that eye! The cheerful how that cavity! That cheek seemed like that nose like the rose and the cherry!

The that droll small mouth was pulled like the bow, self-depreciation of that jaw the snow was white;

The smoke which surrounds that head like the flower garland and the stump of the tube which he grasps hard with that tooth;

There was a wide surface in him, the small circular stomach shook, that him like bowlful of the jelly when laughing.

He is chubby, in spite even in by my I meet to him the time, portly you laugh, the right being pleasant, the old elf, me;

The ã¾ of that eye twist of going back and forth and that head in order to know that has nothing the fact that I fear, gave me directly;

He spoke the word which is not, but it advanced to that work straightly, and satisfied stocking everything;

The fact that side you put that finger of the urgent movement, and that nose, and the fact that signal on the smokestack is given, then being turned, he rose stand;

He leapt to that sleigh, it gave the whistle to that team, like the feather of everyone thistle it flew.

But as for me before he drove from vision, "everything happy Christmas to everything he who inquires about that you shout is completed cripes."

Wow...just wow. Yeah, don't ask. I have NO idea where "cripes" even came from. Soon we'll have the outcome of the Trivial Pursuit competition. So far we've found out that we are pretty even, (the Brother in Law has a half game edge,) and we shouldn't let my Mum play, she aparently knows almost everything...about everything...except maybe basketball.

I will provide the final results as soon as they are available, as well as the results of the impromptu billiards tournament that has been going on. Until then I leave you with:
"Dash! Be mixed up do everything!"

All for now,
Kef...

Freak Curling Accident

2006-12-13T16:29:00.000-05:00

Well, the last post brought on more comments than usual. The Fabulous Mira seems to have sparked some debate as to the validity of playing Trivial Pursuit against family members. I agree with the Sis on this one; who you are playing against is less than relevant unless you grew up in a bubble together. And, I am pretty sure that Mira is 3X New Year’s Eve champ because I wasn’t there for any of those games. (Zing!) I was on her team for our last round of Shout About, (at her birthday,) and we kicked more than a little ass in both games.

But alas, I now declare that subject closed until after the Championship has concluded. It is time to move to more pressing matters. Like how much my foot is FREAKING KILLING ME right now.

Sunday at the curling club started out like any Sunday at the curling club. [Curling: n/v – origin, Scotland – 1. The OTHER Canadian dominated sport played on ice.] Show up, change, stretch, shake hands with the other team while exchanging pleasantries such as “Nice to meet you,” “Good Curling!” or “You are SO going down!” Next, I moved on to the ice to start the game and noticed something strange. The ice was pretty slippery.

Let me take a moment here to explain to those of you who do not curl that I am not completely insane. Yes, ice is always slippery. But, curling ice is pebbled, (they lightly sprinkle water onto the ice so it is not smooth but has a “bumpy” texture, kind of like an orange peel,) and we wear soft rubber soled shoes that grip the ice. Sometimes due to temperature changes or other phenomenon that I am not aware of, the ice gets frosty, (yes, frost on ice, just accept that I know what I am talking about,) and then it is slipperier than normal.

Anyway, I throw second so I was sure to be careful while sweeping our Lead’s rocks until it was my turn to throw. As I moved to the end to take my turn however, I had a momentary lapse of balance and started to slip. Experienced curlers have two instincts if they find themselves falling during a game: 1) Don’t crash your broom on the ice if you can help it, and 2) Don’t crash your head on the ice if you can help it. I managed crash neither broom nor head on the ice and landed solidly on my rump, which may already have a couple pounds of the winter weight on it so it was a decently padded landing. But, here is where the “Freak” part of the accident comes in. At the end of a sheet of curling ice there is a bumper to stop rocks that run through the house. This bumper is just high enough that I can almost get my foot under it. As I slipped, I attempted to jam my foot into that too small space, (not on purpose,) and seeing as it only almost fits, I caught the end of my toe and nearly ripped my big toenail clean off.

I’ll pause here while everyone makes either the universal “Ooo-that-musta-hurt” grimace, or the “Ooo-I’ve-done-that-it-does-hurt” wince with nod.

So now it’s Wednesday and I think I may be in more pain than when it actually happened. I woke up at about four this morning and couldn’t get back to sleep because of it, and I’ve actually considered whether it would be better to just lose the entire foot. (Only briefly, I know how lucky I am to have all my working body parts.) You’d be surprised how hard it is to concentrate when someone is jamming a spike into your toe while it is on fire! Ok, I’m exaggerating and probably sound like a bit of a baby…but I don’t care!

In other recent news, Christmas is upon us so the cubicle decorations have made their way out of the box again and this year my floor is having a team decorating challenge! Stay tuned for pictures.

Icicle lights + green cardboard cut-outs + glue + glitter = no end of holiday fun!

All for now,
Kef…

It's On

2006-11-30T23:42:00.000-05:00

I was wondering what to blog about, and then I received this comment:

anonymous said…
actually it was free range from a local
farm
and you suck at trivial pursuit

Section one of comment is a true story. Part of our conversation at dinner was about how it seemed odd that this free range monster chicken had less growth hormone and other like additives than most grocery store birds.

Section two of comment is NOT a true story. My immediate reaction to section two would normally be, “Your Mama sucks at Trivial Pursuit!” but alas, I believe I know who this anonymous lurker is. It is none other than the almost entirely, but not quite completely less than famous Professor Krispy Giggle-Guts Googieboggie Wise III, (or, My Sis,) and therefore as I mentioned previously, the Mama comment is probably inappropriate. (And, untrue as me Ma has some mad skillz with the trivia.)

Anyway, the Sis, (who continues to think I am a geek, (or nerd, I can’t remember which,) for having a blog and yet continues to read and occasionally comment on said blog,) is probably just a little upset that she lost twice on the weekend. I can understand her frustration. She did not have the luck of the draw for most of the second game. Frequently she would get a brown question (Arts and Lit) for a pie which went something like this, “Who was the poet laureate for Ireland from 1742 to 1753?” (I made that up; I don’t even know if it has an answer.) Then, on my turn I would get something like, “What is the title of the second book in the Lord of the Rings trilogy?” Also, keep in mind that we were playing an original 1981 edition of the game, which incidentally is the year the Sis was born. This was funny when it came to some of the blue (geography) questions that asked us about East Germany, Czechoslovakia, and the USSR.

She’s probably also upset that she subsequently lost the several rounds of “Question Offs” that we had. [Question Off: [kwes-chuh~n awf] – noun – origin: Belleville, early 21st century – 1. A situation where each player in a game of Trivial Pursuit is required to answer all six questions on a single card, the winner being the player that answers the most questions correctly. Usually used to break ties or settle family disputes.]

Or, she’s upset about my uncanny ability to produce answers to questions without even knowing why, (or, as the Brother in Law puts it, to pull answers out of my ass.) For example, take my thought process to answer the question, “Who was the Prime Minister of Britain that preceded Winston Churchill?” Brain says, “Hmm, I’m not good at history. Ok, let’s work this out; I heard a name once, (I think,) that sounds British and sounded important, you know, leader-like.” Mouth says, “Chamberlain…?” Brother in Law falls over backwards (literally) in disbelief. I have since read up on Chamberlain so if the question comes up, “What was the name of the peace treaty Chamberlain signed with Hitler in 1938?” I will know the answer.

The point, (I think,) is this: It’s on!

I hereby declare that this Christmas Holidays will be the official time of the World Championship of Trivial Pursuit. [Note: “World” is used very loosely here. See historical reference on the Badminton Championship of the World.] We will play any and all versions of Trivial Pursuit available, (within reason; I wouldn’t make everyone play the Star Wars version because I would own,) in order to determine the true champion. The contestants of course will be myself, the Sis, and the Brother in Law. Others present will be welcome to join but we wouldn’t want to embarrass you all.

And Kristy, no reading all the cards to study up!

All for now,
Kef…

Thanksgiving Chicken!

2006-11-28T00:05:00.000-05:00

I have mentioned in the past how I am not a fan of turkey. Oversized, dried-out, monster of a bird… don’t get me started. So although I was looking forward to spending time with family this past weekend for Thanksgiving*, I was not necessarily looking forward to the dinner.

As it turned out, I was pleasantly surprised. I looked into the fridge on Saturday and saw what I thought was a smallish turkey ready for the evening feast. (Ready to be part of the feast, rather than ready to partake of it… just thought I’d clarify.) The bird I discovered however was not a smallish turkey, but rather an obscenely largish chicken. How large? Let’s put it this way. If one was to go to a Swiss Chalet for lunch after church on a Sunday, (as close to 99.97% of church goers in the TDot do,) and one was feeling quite hungry, one might order the Half-Chicken Dinner, rather than just the Quarter-Chicken (white or dark.) Half of our Thanksgiving Chicken fed the five people sitting around the table to the “OOOOooooOOOO I am so full” level.

This of course helps my argument against turkey. Even though this chicken was friggin’ huge, it still kept all of its juicy chicken goodness, as opposed to the not-so-juicy turkey not-so-goodness that we are normally accustomed to at Thanksgiving. (Note: except for the turkey my sister, Professor Krispy Giggle-Guts Googieboggie Wise III, made last Christmas which was insanely juicy, (i.e. you could almost wring it out,) due to the fact that she basted it every two minutes according to Cheri.)

I realized something else while hanging out with my sister all weekend. “Your Mama” jokes just aren’t as effective on siblings.

Oh, and I’m better at Trivia Pursuit than my Sis.

All for now,
Kef…

*To any American readers this seems pretty normal, but to explain for those in the Great White North, my Step-Mum is American, (and Canadian, but she was born in the U.S.)

Formerly Known As...

2006-11-02T15:38:00.000-05:00

My good friend JWE, (also known as the Neurotic One,) who used to get a link for his name but doesn't any more because he doesn't update his blog... In fact, I think it has come to getting bumped from the side, too.

Anyway, where was I? JWE has changed his name. He shall henceforth be known as:

Jarnospaldervangundersonsen Spelly McSpellerson

Ok, so I changed his name for him, but he brought it on himself. As in the past I will shorten his name for blogging purposes which should be nothing new as his old last name contained redundant letters and people were always trying to shorten it for him. I am debating about the short form, however. One option is JSM, you know to keep the three character standard. This could get confusing for some readers though as Jess sometimes uses the JMS as a sign-off. I'd hate to have someone confuse the two of them because Jess is prettier and Jarnospaldervangundersonsen is a bigger geek, (Hold on now...those are both compliments!) The second option for contraction is JSMcS. There are more letters, but five is way easier to manage than the forty-five in his ridiculously long name.

I wonder if his wife will want to change her name? I don't think she did the first time, (you know, redundant letters and all,) but Angel McSpellerson actually sounds kind of nice. I'll be there on the weekend so I can sort out all the details.

That is, if I don't get buried under the shed.

All for now,
Kef...

Man Cannot Live on Candy and Caffeine Alone

2006-11-01T14:20:00.000-05:00

Usually I get a bad case of Monday every week. It strikes hard around sunup and continues until almost noon. Sometimes, after an exceptionally busy weekend or a late Sunday night, the flare up of Monday can continue well into the afternoon. Monday isn't contagious but symptoms are such that one should be isolated if at all possible. One can usually counteract Monday with a healthy dose of caffeine. A Grande Americano will do the trick, but sometimes the forth shot is required.

Occasionally in a week where there has been a particularly virulent occurrence of Monday, it is followed by an outbreak of Tuesday. Tuesday is different in almost every way. It is usually accompanied by a higher than normal level of morning cheerfulness, random silliness, loud talking and bad jokes. (With individuals where loud talking and bad jokes are common, these symptoms are greatly magnified.) Tuesday can also be contagious, infecting others with silliness and loud talking especially. The cause of Tuesday is a mystery but theories include too much sleep after a case of Monday or an overactive adrenal gland. Unlike Monday, caffeine will NOT help a case of Tuesday, in fact it is almost guaranteed to amplify the visible symptoms. However, those that have become addicted to caffeine to battle Monday will find ceasing consumption next to impossible.

Yesterday I had an extremely bad case of Tuesday. Mix with that with the fact that it was Candy Day, (otherwise known as the Eve of All Hallowed Saints Day,) and you'll see the potential recipe for disaster. I ate about six pounds of candy yesterday and drank upwards of three Grande Americanos, (Americanoes? Americani?) Around mid-afternoon, when I was starting to feel the effects of a combined sugar and caffeine crash, I did what any sane individual would do with the materials at hand. I ate more candy and drank more caffeine. Bad news. I went home after work and slept a good portion of the evening away on the chesterfield while my body screamed at me, "What are you doing to me you crazy ba-- fish dropping?!"

In the late evening, I contemplated my state of being and it occurred to me that it was almost November. "That it!" I said, (to nobody in particular because the Roomy wasn't home,) "Time to recommit!"

If you're unfamiliar with my story thus far, my brief lack of internal monologue refers to The November Resolution. Now keep in mind that I have not fallen completely off the wagon. I have been shifted all the way to one side and am holding on with both hands, but the lifestyle change I made has stuck for the most part. At this point I need to recommit to rising early for spin class or the treadmill, hitting the weights a couple times a week, and bringing a healthy lunch more frequently. I am still curling twice a week and playing squash once or twice a week so it shouldn't be too hard. I am setting a bigger goal for next summer by training for a half marathon and hopefully the half-iron triathlon in Parry Sound. So, now that we know all that, there is only one more thing to say:

The faster I finish these m&m's and jelly beans, the faster I can get on with it.

All for now,
Kef...

IT Paralysis

2006-10-25T11:26:00.000-04:00

Today at work the server was down. This doesn't happen often so this isn't a rant about how IT is suck and nothing ever works. But, it did show me how much we rely on the data that is stored on some distant entity we call, "The Group Drive."

The Group Drive is wonderful. It holds almost all our data for us, allowing team members kilometers away to share the information and share the work. It holds almost all our applications for us, allowing us to use slightly less powered PC's at our desk with slightly less "local" storage, (and with many of our apps becoming "web based", pretty soon all our desktops will need to run is a browser.) Then, on days like today, the Group Drive holds us hostage.

It was frustrating to say the least. Here is a typical conversation from today:

Kef: This is suck!
Kinch: What's going on?
Kef: I can't work on this rec because I can't get to my database.
Kinch: Can you get to Infopac?
Kef: Yeah...
Kinch: Print the report from there.
Kef: And compare it to...
Kinch: The data you pulled from your database yesterday.
Kef: Oh right, the data that I put into the excel file...
Kinch: Yeah!
Kef: The excel file that is saved on The Group Drive...
Kinch: Yeah! Oh...this is suck!

See how exciting the world of Corporate Finance can be? No? Look again...see it?

Ok, so my job may not be thrilling to all of you, but I like it. And, I work with great people so that makes it fun and the weeks go by quick.

Anyway, squash tonight so that'll be fun. (By that I mean I am playing squash tonight, not that I am going to try and compact under my foot the time between now and midnight, you know, in case you were confused.)

Good thing I don't store my squash racquet on the group drive.

All for now,
Kef...

Insight @ *bux

2006-09-28T15:10:00.000-04:00

This is on my coffee cup:

The Way I See It #148
Great teachers should be paid like doctors
or corporate attorneys. I worry about
what will happen to our economy and
our democracy if we don't start to take
teachers' jobs seriously.

--Ninive Clements Calegari

Hear hear!

All for now,
Kef...

Getting more creative?

2006-09-21T16:52:00.000-04:00

No, not me. The spammers.

Like most workplaces, our email system at the Tire has a spam filter and it is usually really good. Lately however, it is being a bit more selective with what gets stopped on the way in. For instance, I regularly receive notes in my inbox with a tag after the subject line. I guess this is to make sure that the filter isn't deleting messages from friends or colleagues outside of the company but I would rather it just go ahead with the "BALETED" and let my friends complain once a month that I didn't respond to them.

Some messages now though, are starting to get through without even the tag attached. Today I got one with a "who" that was a name of a friend, even with the unusual spelling, so I opened it thinking it was from him. After the vaguely unrelated subject line of "next month" the note started like most spam messages:

Listen, time is now to purchase your health needs.

[next is a link that I wouldn't ever click, so therefore wouldn't ever re-link]
is having a end of summer sale that has sa vings over 67%. [sic]
Fast delivery. 1000's of goods, all ready 4u

[at this point, the message veered away from the sales pitch]
Seems to me the same way, said Billina, scornfully, if that beastly cat is one of them
So he set the indicator to that point and began gliding swiftly toward the southeast

So what, is this spammer trying their hand at creative writing? Normally I would just 76 it and move on, but I found it somewhat amusing so I printed it out and took it over to show Kinch. "Funny, I got one kinda like it."

[mostly same sales pitch for "discounted health needs", then:]
Jim hesitated, eyeing the beasts fearfully
Oh, if you don't want to go, began Rob, I can easily-- But I do! I do! I do! cried the little man, interrupting him

See, now I am intrigued. These two excerpts obviously go together! I want to know what happens next.
Will Jim go with Rob into the den of the beasts?
Will the cat lead Billina to the other two heroes?
Will he make it in time to help them?
What side is the cat on?

SOMEONE PLEASE SEND ME MORE SPAM SO I CAN CONTINUE THE STORY!!!

Oh wait, no, don't do that, please don't do that. Maybe I'll just have to try writing more of the story myself. Although, I think Billina will become a girl in my version. (By that I mean that Billina will be a girl, not somehow become one as PART of the story.) Like I have time for this. This may be a long running project. I'll try and keep you updated.

I wonder if there is copyright infringement on the original spam text?

All for now,

Kef...

100th Post!!

2006-09-21T16:38:00.000-04:00

Yaay! 100th Post! How exciting!

Ok, now on to something more important.

Back to the beach

2006-09-13T15:45:00.000-04:00

A quick update:

Been here for five days.
Been to the beach three times.
Read two books.
Competed in a triathlon.
Went to Universal.
Rode my bike from one end of Sunset to the other.

Some observations:
It's nice here. It has been sunny and warm the entire time I've been here.
I love the beach. I think I'll go again.
I'm glad I brought four books, (plus the one I was reading when I packed.)
There are a LOT of fit people in the LA area.
Universal Studios theme park is boring. I have been spoiled by Wonderland.
There are some big homes in the Hills.

Ok, I'm almost out of time here at the SMPL, so I have to go.

Which way to the beach!?

All for now,
Kef...

...or is it just me

2006-09-07T18:29:00.000-04:00

No, it was hot! My office that is.

Tuesday was coming in after the long weekend, pretty refreshed, looking forward to my holiday, (more in a sec,) when I had a strange surprise as I got off the elevator on my floor. I was about to wave and give a smile and cheery "Hi! How's it going?!" to Jen and Delana at the reception desk, but what came out was, "What's going on?!" through a concerned grimace. It was unusually warm in the smallish lobby/elevator area and I remember thinking, "it must suck to be these ladies this morning." Jen looked up and replied, "Oh, wait until you go into the main office." I opened the door and it was like that first wave of heat when you open your oven that has been pre-heated to cookie/pizza baking temperature. Seriously, my cabinet was hot, my phone was hot, my chair was hot, it was gross, (and not gross like 144...sorry, awful.) The vents in the office that come up by the windows and down from around the lights were still kicking it out like a hair dryer, too. Those of us that were there didn't last long before we had to go down to the main building lobby and wait it out until they could get the air conditioner going.

But, work has not been my main concern this week. Well it is when I am AT work but I meant when I leave. No, this week it has been getting ready for my holiday! (And, Something Good...sit tight, it's soon I promise.) I decided I was going away for a week, somewhere I had to fly, and somewhere that is warm. I decided to go most of the way across the continent to spend a week in LA. I'll probably spend some time doing the touristy stuff like the walk of fame, Universal Studios, etc. but then I think I'll just spend a lot of time walking or riding around or hanging out at the beach. I just want to get away from my own city for a while. It's a good thing I'm not a star chaser though otherwise my timing couldn't be worse. This week is the start of the Toronto Film Festival. That's right, I am going to LA to bum around Hollywood for a week while all the stars are in my home town. Brilliant, I know. Maybe that will just mean that there will be less snooties in the coffee houses and restaurants that I want to go to. Not that I know what ones I want to go to. I haven't really planned anything.

Other than maybe learning to surf. I'll let you know how that goes.

All for now,
Kef...

My name is Kevin, and I have a problem

2006-08-31T19:28:00.000-04:00

That's the first step right? Admitting I have a problem? What's the step where I say I don't really have a problem and it's not hurting anyone? Wait, that's denial, and that is another whole series of steps...I think.

So what is this problem of which I speak. My friend Joy mentioned it for any cross-reading blog type people. Yes, I am addicted to World of Warcraft. Yes that is a computer game, and yes I am a nerd. If my Sis still reads this she'll have a field day, she thinks it's bad enough I have a blog. At least she can't make fun of me for this without admitting to reading MY blog, which would make her a nerd, too. So anyway, when I am on line, that is what I have been doing. It's fun, I don't care what you think. (Unless this is Marty or Joy in which case I am pretty sure they think it is ok, and therefore I do care.)

It has been almost two weeks since my second triathlon. I feel even more now that I can say I am a triathlete as now I have done two races in a season. This separates me from that guy who once showed up to an event and never went back. I am falling more in love with this sport. The last event was the Northern Triathlon in Orillia, (which really isn't that far north I know, but I didn't name it.) It was the Ontario Short Course Championship, (or something like that,) so there were about 1200 athletes there competing. HUGE compared to the first event I went to. This also meant the level of competition was much higher. I finished 21 out of the 27 or so in my age group which amounted to somewhere in the high 400's overall, (468 or something.) Like last time though, I wasn't competing against the veterans of the sport or the eventual podium finishers. I was competing for myself, but also against a friend from work. Kinch and his wife were at this event, too, so there was a friendly rivalry going on. He is a runner. He has actually completed marathons so he can have that title of Runner. I knew I would need to be faster on the swim and bike in order to have any chance of beating him. We were even on the swim and I gained a couple minutes on the bike which I knew I would as it is his weakest leg, (despite dropping my chain half way through and having to dismount to replace it.) The run though. Ugh. I was at about the 4K mark of the scheduled 7K and I saw him coming the other way on the out and back course. "I'm comin' for ya Kev!" was all I heard as he blazed past the other way. It wasn't long until he made good on that claim. Now let me point out here how a "wave start" system works. I am younger than Greg by a year so I started in a different wave. This means to start the race I had an artificial 3 minute lead on him. The fact that he passed me with about 2K left of the run shows how good a runner he is. My splits were about 5:15/Km, and his were a blistering 4:14/Km. He gained 7 minutes on me in the run alone! Like I said, it was friendly competition though and I had no trouble saying congrats at the finish line and humbly show the rest of our team at work the results.

Especially since I was showing them all that his wife beat us both!

All for now,
Kef...

Still at it

2006-08-09T23:14:00.000-04:00

I didn't take much time off from the training. Swimming seems to be coming along the best right now. I think I have already knocked 30-40 seconds off my 100m split so I should save some time on the first leg next event. The biking and running have been average. I have run a couple of times with a group from the Running Room and that is great having a group of people to motivate you and not just yourself to stay on track. Sunday I did a long ride up North of Brampton through rolling hill type country. The way out was more up than down and I was struggling up the last couple of hills, but I still managed to pound it back for a quicker home split. I feel good about it right now and I should be more than ready for Orillia.

I spent the weekend at my Mum's out in Brampton. Sis and her Husband were up from Kingston so it was a fun weekend. Andrew's an F1 fan so we were up early to watch the Hungarian Grand Prix, (I missed the first bit.) I then convinced him to watch a race with me, so we watched the Brickyard 400 Nascar race in the afternoon. Then, Kristy and I went and got a Chillabration cake from DQ for no other reason than we kept seeing the commercials and wanted icecream cake.

Today was the first day back at work. Going back after a long weekend is tough, but one thing that kept me going was knowing that Friday was only two days away. I have a lot to do before Friday though.

Guess I should make sleep one of them.

All for now,
Kef...

Well, I did it!

2006-08-02T23:34:00.000-04:00

I am a triathlete!

I can say that officially now. For the last twelve weeks I have been training for this thing but that's all it was...training. Now that I have finally completed my first event I can say that I am a triathlete, not just some guy that might at some point participate in a triathlon. And, yes I did go through with it despite the chest cold I am still dealing with. (Thanks for the concern from those that read, and sometimes comment (Joy;))

I can't say the race went off without a hitch though. At several points on the Saturday I didn't know if there was going to be a race at all. It all started when I woke up at about 5am to thunder and lightning over the lake, (I was staying up at the Breadner's place.) This made me a little down because I thought I might not be able to get over to the race site as I had to go by boat. It stopped when I got up though and even got sunny as I made my way to the event and started to get myself set up. About 15 minutes before the scheduled start however it started to rain again. They gathered us all together for the "pre-race" (like announcements) to say they think we are going to delay a little bit because of the fear of lightning. Right after he said that, there was a flash over the lake and huge CRACK of thunder. "Well that means at least an hour more delay."

They got us all back together again about an hour later and it was clearer, but there was still a lot of wind and the lifeguards weren't letting anyone back into the lake. I was really bummed because I was sure they were going to tell us that it was cancelled and sorry, see you next time. They gave us some options though. Option one was to run a 10K race right then. Option two was to run the sprint triathlon the next day while the Half Iron distance event was running. Option three was to do both. I chose number two. I did stick around for the 10K though. I helped at the aid station which was both the halfway and finish point, and got to chat with a few of the event organizers about the whole triathlon/duathlon scene.

So now Sunday was the day of the big race. The funny thing is I actually slept better Saturday night, and when I got to the event on Sunday morning, I was not nearly as nervous as the previous day because I felt like I had already been through all that first time build up and anticipation. I feel like I raced pretty well for my first time. I know I can do better and I know there were some factors that held me back this time but I am not making excuses because I know I can only go up. I set a goal for myself of 90 minutes. My finishing time was 1:29:59! Talk about cutting it close. If you look at the picture, you can see me desperately sprinting for the finish line before the clock rolled over to 1:30:00.

I'll relate one quick story where I lost a bit of time because it is actually a little comical. The transition between swim and bike (or T1) is probably the biggest change because you have to put on a shirt, shoes, helmet, sunglasses, etc. and then get your bike ready to run out to the "mount" line. One thing I noticed in the rules was that you had to display your race bib with your number on your front for at least the run. I figured it would be easiest to just put it on the shirt before the start of the race. Funny thing happens with safety pins in a stretchy shirt when you are trying to pull it over your wet body: they open up. So there I was struggling to pull the shirt down without stabbing myself, then doing up one pin only to have another one open up. I was actually laughing pretty hard and could get my helmet done up. I'm sure I looked quite the newbie.

Anyway, I guess the point is that I had a blast. The people were great, I got to meet some premiere athletes in the Half Iron distance event, and I proved to myself that I could do this. And, I discovered it's addictive. I can't wait until my next event!

See you all in Orillia!

All for now,
Kef...

p.s. Blogger is stupid right now and I can't post the picture. Check later if you want to see my embarrassing finish line shot.

T-minus 3 days...and sick!

2006-07-26T22:56:00.000-04:00

BAH! FOA!!

It is Wednesday. Saturday is my first triathlon. I have been training now for nearly 12 weeks! And, what do I go and do. Get sick! BAH I say! Monday I got up with a little bit of a sore throat. Not too uncommon. But, I got to work and started to feel like 10lbs of crap in a 2lb bag. By 9:30 I had to go home. I tried again on Tuesday and lasted until 11ish when the VP finally told me to beat it. Today was much better, but I think I am moving to a flare up of the full fledged bronchitis, so around 3:00 I was fading big time.

Two days to kick this one and it isn't looking good. And, to top it all off, tonight we had our last ball hockey game. We ended up the season 1fer. There are eight teams in the league and I bet you can't guess how many make the playoffs. Ok, if you said seven, you're right, BUT NO PRIZE!

No witty closing line for you...NEXT!!

All for now,
Kef...

p.s. hot tea with lemon and honey is my new best friend

Wrong number, the right way

2006-07-20T16:58:00.000-04:00

So if you've been following along at home, you know of the idi-- lovely young lady that phoned me that I nicknamed: Random Girl. I still bristle when I think about it and I have told the story countless times to people when they mention they received or dialed a wrong number. The other day however, I received a call on my cell that let me know that there are still some decent and polite, (although maybe a little phone dyslexic,) people in this world.

I'll set it up: Phone rings. It's a number I don't recognize and immediately I get my back up. I consider not answering it but I had had a bad day and I was kind of looking for a fight.

Kef: Good afternoon, Kef speaking. (Still in work mode.)
Random Kind Gentleman: Oh, I think I must have the wrong number.
[pause]
RKG: Is George there?
Kef: No, I think you're right, you must have the wrong number.
RKG: Ok, sorry about that. Good bye.

This Random Kind Gentleman, (I had to add another adjective so as not to be confused with the RG of Random Girl. I did originally consider calling her RIB,) knew how to handle himself when he got someone he didn't recognize on the line. He was a little hopeful asking for George anyway, but I can understand that because he might feel stupid if he actually did have the correct number and had to call back right away.

You'd think that this call might pull me out of my foul mood and give me a little hope for our society, and it partially did. But, a big part of me wanted to call Random Girl to tell her about the encounter and ask her why she didn't have the decency to act like a polite, respectable human being, (and ask her if she found Crystal yet.) Luckily I count myself among those that for the most part can be found on the "Decent" side of the line in society so I resisted sinking to the level of those on the other side...this time.

Goodness knows what'll happen if she ever calls again.

All for now,
Kef...

My still strange apartment

2006-07-18T11:33:00.000-04:00

Here is another quick story about an oddity at my apartment.

Sunday was the work golf tourney, (one of them,) so Sunday night I was home after a long day of golf; a long hot day of golf; a long hot day of golf where I actually stopped sweating for the last three holes I think I was so dehydrated. But, enough about that, I was fine and it has nothing to do with the story about my apartment. I was working on the computer and I was just in the middle of something good when I had a bit of heart failure. The power went out and I had no idea when I had last saved.

*FOA* (for those that don't know, that is "Fist Of Anger")

Actually my reaction was more along the lines of, "Oh 5417!" followed by the sound of the CPU fan decelerating while my shoulders sunk and my spirits faded. But, never one to cry over spilt milk, I got up from the desk and went to the kitchen, to get some milk. In the kitchen pouring said glass of milk I realized something strange. I could see what I was doing. I walked back down the hall to the Roomy's room and looked in as he was hanging up the phone.

"Notice anything strange?" I asked.

"The power's out. Not that strange." This is quite true. I swear they do rolling brownouts to reduce the load on the grid on really hot days when everyone is running fans and air conditioners.

"Come out here in the hall."

He came out to the hall and saw the lights in the main room and kitchen. "Ok, so we blew a fuse," (yes fuse, the building is pretty old.)

"We got one fuse that runs all the power in my room, your room, the bathroom, hall, and the plugs on the wall where the TV, DVD, cable box, etc. are plugged in?"

"Huh, seems strange doesn't it."

We spent the next ten or fifteen minutes changing out all of the eight fuses with ones we knew were good and that didn't solve the problem. Next I called down to security, or the "after hours" number as the management office puts it.

"Hey, I hate to bother you but I have a bit of a strange problem in my apartment."

"Half your power's out."

"Whoa, how'd you know?!" (Actual reaction. It hadn't yet occurred to me that someone else may have already called.)

"Lots of people have called." (It was about here I felt like an idiot.) "We don't know what the problem is but someone is working on it."

Well, by about 11:00 it still hadn't been fixed so I decided I needed to go to bed. It was dark in my room so it wasn't really a problem. At about 2:00am the power came back in my room. How do I know this you ask? No, I remembered to turn the light switch to the off position, but apparently pressing the power button on the computer and monitor does nothing if there is no power. I probably would have stayed asleep for the time the monitor was on before going to blank screen and then power save but the speakers came on unmuted as well and the Windows startup sound blasted me awake, (I had been playing Civ 4 earlier, too, so it was loud because that game is quieter than everything else, (I know I can probably fix that but it is just easier to turn the speakers up and down, (and yes I know that I am double, (and now triple and quadruple) parenthesizing but this is my blog and I don't stand on ceremony.)))

So then I was awake at 2:00am, considering getting back onto the computer to see how much I had lost of what I was working on, (pretty much all of it I later discovered,) but I remembered that I had to be up for work and considering Tuesday was my department's golf day I need to make the most of it.

I think at some point when I sat down to write this I had a point. Oh yeah:

My apartment is strange.

All for now,
Kef...

My Spaced...

2006-07-11T23:41:00.000-04:00

I gotta ask: What is so good about myspace? Why are all these people hooked on it?

I find it truly annoying to tell you the truth. I tried to get myself set up because some of my friends communicate on there and I thought it might be another way to get the word out about TSL and Global Coastal Flooding, but nothing seemed to work. I got this "unexpected error, being sent to myspace support" about a hundred times and even "the cannot find server" page on several occasions!

And, this is just getting set up. I still fail to see the usefulness of the place. The commenting system is confusing considering people are always answering comments on each other's sites. It's like reading one half of a whole bunch of conversations. At least with blog comments here, (or on many other blog type sites,) you might get some discussion going in the comments.

Bah, maybe I'll try again tomorrow. Right now, too frustrated.

All for now,
Kef...

Tell me what you like about movies these days

2006-07-09T23:11:00.000-04:00

I dare you. Is it the action? Is it the love stories? Is it the fact that they are telling the same stories over and over again and that makes you comfortable because it is familiar?

I know that I am not part of the entertainment industry and maybe that means that I don't have a say into what movies are being made. But maybe, not being part of the entertainment industry makes me a bigger part of it than I know. I mean, I'm only the consumer, the amateur critic, fan of the film media, and oh yeah:

The guy who buys the tickets to these movies. [yes I haven't seen the last one, but I'm already skeptical]

Maybe that doesn't mean anything. Maybe my $12 doesn't let me decide what movies should be made. But maybe I can decide what movies can be made, maybe I can even demand it.

Jessica Mae Stover is a talented artist that has written a story (code name: TSL) that should be made into a movie. I've read her work and I know this is going to be good. I'm going right out there and saying that. (I'd also say you can blame me later if it isn't but that won't happen.) But, she needs your help getting this to fly. Some of us have started a movement of sorts and you can be involved.

Here is what Jess is saying about it.
Here are some others that care.

Eventful is a cool idea of a site that lets people demand artists in their city. For instance, there is a band that I want to see in the Tdot, I can start a demand and if it gets big enough, they will work with the band to try and make it happen.

What we are doing here is certainly different, but no less plausible. Check the link at the side and go and demand this in your city. Pick one that's there or start one in your home town, then tell everyone you know about it. Tell the movie industry that you want better movies made and they are there just waiting to be picked up.

We are the squeaky wheel, people.

Go and demand your grease.

All for now,
Kef...

We are not suck anymore!

2006-07-05T17:06:00.001-04:00

Ok, so we are still suck. But, we are no longer 0fer.

That's right! The Cyclones broke the streak with a win last night against the Road Runners. It was a thrilling 4-3 come from behind victory with only three subs on the bench. I have to tell you though, I'd hate to be the Road Runners today. In the same way that nobody wants to be the team that always loses, nobody wants to be the team that lost to the team that always loses.

Now we just have to go out there and do it again tonight.

All for now,
Kef...

UPDATE: Back to the suck. Wednesday night's game was NOT awesome.

My Dad the Handyman

2006-07-04T20:04:00.000-04:00

I just got back from a long weekend at my Dad's in Belleville. Since Canada Day was on Saturday, my team at work got the choice of having either Friday or Monday off for the long weekend. I took both! So just to clarify for those that are bad at math, I had a four day weekend.

Marge: Homer, your work called and said if you don't go to work tomorrow, not to bother going in on Monday.
Homer: WOO HOO! Four day weekend!

I'll stop talking about my four day weekend now, (before Dariush drives halfway across the continent to strangle me.)

Ok, I'll stop talking about how long it was, I'm still going to talk about what I did. I had originally planned to ride my bike down to Belleville from Toronto and take the train back on Monday. There was a threat of thunderstorms all along the lake on Friday however, so I changed my mind and drove there and just packed my bike in the back for a Saturday ride. Saturday morning proved to be disappointing as my England lost in their quarter-final match to Portugal. (I'm still upset, so that is all on that topic.) Saturday afternoon I got ambitious and went for a long ride. I rode from Rossmore, (near Belleville,) to Colborne and back. It was nearly a 120km ride and it took me a little more than 4.5 hours to complete. I would have done better but my body is apparently not ready for an endurance race yet. At about 90km, that is halfway back, I started to feel the burn. This was no "Yeah, keep working! Feel the burn!" It was a "I think my legs are actually on fire and may fall off pretty soon," kind of burn. Even more ridiculous was my initial notion to get back from the ride and run two or three km to get used to the transition. Yeah right.

The rest of the weekend was spent eating, sleeping, doing a little nothing, (a skill I think men are particularly good at,) and observing my Dad in his natural habitat. The Village Handyman. Since his retirement, the people of Sunrise Court and some of the surrounding area have come to know that my Dad knows how to fix things and have adopted him as their go to guy when something is broken or a problem needs an inventive workaround. He does his work cheap, too. Usually if the parts are handy and there is the occasional beer involved, my Dad will have the know-how and tool to complete the job. And, if he doesn't have THE tool, he can make one from the tools he has. (Now you know where I get it from, see #2 here.)

I witnessed a couple examples of this improvisational skill this past weekend. The first was when Dad decided he wanted to put a plug hole in the boat. He has a small, (eight or ten foot) aluminum boat. If the boat gets water in it, it is easier to run it with the plug out to drain the water than to fiddle with a baling bucket. He wanted a hole that had an outward flare so as to create a good seal with the rubber plug. He started by drilling a quarter inch hole with a spade bit. Took about four seconds. Next he took a metal rod about the size of the hole and was going to swing it around to flare the freshly drilled hole. Problem was, the rod was too long considering the hole was right near the bottom of the boat. Dad stood up and put on the "thinking frown" for a minute. "I need a taper" he said as he started towards the garage. "Do you HAVE a taper?" I asked, thinking that we should have started there in the first place. "Nope" he responded without looking back. Upon entering the garage, I found my Dad already rifling through his socket sets. He stood straight up with a "Eureka!" type pose and showed me his "taper." A 6mm hex-bit quarter-inch-drive socket...with a tapered edge. "This'll do" he said as he grabbed his plastic head mallet and made his way back down to the boat. And, it did work. Made a perfect flare for the plug that he was given by a neighbour, (probably as payment for one odd job or another.)

The second was later working on the same boat. The motor actually. A 15hp Johnston that was given to him by the Doctor across the bay, (definitely payment for one of the countless jobs he has helped the good Doctor with on his sailboat.) We had just mounted the engine on the boat and had given it the first test start. It ran well considering it had been packed in the garage all winter but it wasn't perfect. "I wonder if there's an idle screw inside?" my Dad wondered aloud. When he took off the cover he noticed something amiss. A small regulator piece on the throttle wasn't sitting right and when he touched it, it broke. After taking apart all he could with the proper tools, (that I was sent to fetch in the garage,) he came to the broken piece that was firmly attached to a type of pivot. "I wonder if that's an O-ring?" came another audible wondering, shortly before he got up and headed to his workshop, (where all his model trains and RC airplanes are kept.) He came back with what appeared to be a dentist pick and a medical clamp. "Can you get it off without losing it?" I asked, although it was a stupid question because he probably wouldn't have done it otherwise. My answer came with a quick poke, clip, twist, then him handing me a tiny, (as in no more than 4mm diameter,) greasy O-ring.

As I was getting ready to leave, my Dad had received two more requests for help. One from John next door for help with something on his boat, and I know Dad also wanted to get over to see what latest project the good Doctor had on the go. The latter I think he actually looks forward to though as he gets to go sailing. Cheri, my Step-Mum wonders what the neighbourhood did before they moved there six years ago. Probably they paid some professional an exorbitant amount of money to come out to the boonies to even look at the perceived problem du jour. I am sensing a business opportunity for my Dad.

He should demand better wages than beers and boat plugs.

All for now,
Kef...

I'm pretty sure you have the wrong number

2006-06-28T21:58:00.000-04:00

Conversation between me and the goofball who phoned me on my cell phone this afternoon:

Kef: Good afternoon, Kef speaking. (I was still in work mode)
Random Girl: Hi, is Crystal there?
Kef: I'm sorry, I think you have the wrong number.
RG: No, this is the number she gave me, I called her last night.

[pause]

Kef: Not at this number you didn't because I've never spoken to you before.
RG: Yes, I talked to her.

[another pause]

Kef: What number are you trying to call?
RG rhymes off my number.
Kef: Well I don't know what to tell you because that's my number and I'm not Crystal.
RG: Well this is her number.

[yet another pause as I grab my now aching head]

Kef: Listen, I obviously don't know you or Crystal, so you have the wrong number.
RG: Whatever.
[RG hangs up]

Now is it just me, or was that Random Girl rude to the extreme, or just slow? I am fairly certain nobody named Crystal was using my phone last night. And, usually if I call someone and it is not who I am looking for, I feel a little silly and might even apologize. Not so with Random Girl. After I asked what number she was trying to call and confirmed that it was actually my number, she got right indignant with me. Did she think I was hiding Crystal from her? Does Crystal owe her money and I am some Random Guy keeping her from her money?

Needless to say I was confused, frustrated, and a little ticked at Random Girl after that call. The thing is, I have her number now because of call display and I feel like I should reverse lookup to figure out who this numpty is.

Or maybe I'll call her to see if she has found Crystal yet.

All for now,
Kef...

2006-06-27T10:05:00.000-04:00

Ok, so some work is being done

Ontario studies wind-power impact

At least one of my governments is acting like they are concerned about renewable energy. I just hope that the less than constant nature of wind is not a deterrent to adding more of this clean energy to our grid.

I hate that the skeptic in me worries that this study is somehow sponsored by an agent of some coal mining company.

All for now,
Kef...

I have to do what? Because who said so?

2006-06-26T23:13:00.000-04:00

Dariush... This is the like the chain letter of the blogsphere. But, never one to be a party pooper, I will oblige. Here are my answers to some seemingly random questions that give surprising insight to who I am, (or at least where I store stuff.)

5 things in my refrigerator:
1. Beer
2. Milk
3. Bread
4. Eggs (all pretty normal so far)
5. A random can of Mountain Dew Energy that I don't remember buying. Have to ask the Roomy.

5 things in my closet
1. My Rock Jersey (Yaaay!)
2. My Leafs Jersey (Yaaay!)
3. My England Football Jersey (Yaaa...hold on, I'm sensing a theme)
4. A sleeping bag
5. About 8 pairs of pants that are too big for me (ok, that deserves a Yaaay!)

5 things in my pockets
1. Wallet (the small version)
2. Six cents (change from Timmy's)
3. Movie ticket stub (An Inconvenient Truth, go see it!)
4. A restaurant napkin with some hot girl's phone number (yeah I wish, I don't have anything else in my pockets, oh wait!)
5. My hand! (Hand in my pocket hand in my pocket hand in my pocket...HAHA you're totally singing that now!)

5 things in my car and/or trunk
1. Diet Coke (I bought one because I really wanted it then left it in the car *grumble*)
2. Emergency beach sweater (when we go to the beach there is always a cold girl)
3. All my Coldplay CDs
4. My Jays cap
5. My golf clubs

5 people that get tagged
I don't know if I know 5 people that will do this.
Um, Joy
Um, Her husband Critter (Joy needs to get him a blog)
Um, JWE (I don't think he remembers he has a blog)
Um, Angel (Neither does she)
Um, Shafa!

I guess it's bad form to tag the tagger, eh? ROCK IT! ;)

Ohandnotouchbacks. 'Cause I'm King Counter no higher no lower called it stamped it no erasies got the golden key flushed it down the toilet black balls beats them all!

All for now,
Kef...

I'll tell you what's inconvenient...

2006-06-23T00:39:00.000-04:00

Cities under water, that's what!

I have done a bit of ranting about what my thoughts are concerning Global Coastal Flooding. I'm not really an activist but I do try to do my part, even if that is just passing on the message. For instance, this week has been Clean Air Commute week in the Tdot, (and other cities I'm sure but I only live in this one right now.) I have done my part as always by not driving to work and instead taking the transit or riding my bike. I have also tried my best to get coworkers to do the same, (Kinch rode his bike in at least once this week.) See, passing the message.

Here's another message. An Inconvenient Truth.

I have heard a lot about this film recently. I have heard Letterman talk about it. I have seen posters and elevator news feeds about it. I have seen Joy talk about it. I have seen talented artists, (like Terra Naomi,) talk about it. Please go see this movie. Yes it's Al Gore. Who cares? It is the content that is important.

So important. There's not room for everyone in Denver.

Ignore the messenger if you have to, but absorb the message.

All for now,
Kef...

Busy week...

2006-06-22T17:32:00.000-04:00

I find I say that a lot recently. There is something to be said for a routine, the day to day, week to week that you can begin to count on like that interesting (read: crazy) lady you see at the corner everyday. But, I also find that the weeks fly by in a blink with nothing by which to really remember them. I mean there is the occasional laugh at work or with friends, but those blur into the routine rather than mark a point in the summer to be remembered apart from all the others.

Summer. That is what got me thinking about this I think. Yesterday was the first day of summer and in a place where the summer is pretty short, that is a big deal. But the start of summer also means something else. Yesterday was the longest day of the year. (Note: I mean daylight. No getting all technical on me.) Every day from now until almost Christmas is going to be shorter than the last. I felt like I should have done something with that longest day, like I should have had big plans to take advantage of the solstice. But, I didn't. Instead I went and played hockey like I always do on Wednesday, and lost like I always do, (we are STILL suck.) I have a Board meeting tonight which will be a little different, but even that happens every month and is still part of the larger routine.

Stuck. I guess that is how I feel. Don't get me wrong, I am blessed to have a great job at a great company and I have good friends, family, health, etc. But, I seem to be lacking some measure of adventure. This is one of the reasons I am so excited about the events I have coming up. Competing in a triathlon is new and exciting and so that gets me going for a while. Not letting the fact the even training for this has become part of the routine is a different story. I also booked my holidays for the late summer. I just decided to go somewhere I have always wanted to go and do things I think will be fun, new, and exciting. I'll tell you more about it later, I don't want to get to worked up about it yet as it is in September.

Well, off to the meeting. Maybe I'll try and mix things up a bit tonight, keep everyone on their toes.

Wouldn't want everyone to be stuck.

All for now,
Kef...

Living it up I guess

2006-06-17T23:28:00.000-04:00

The last few days I have been a bit of a man about town it seems. I have been doing things that I might normally do once every few months and I have to tell you that I could really get used to it.

Thursday I went to see Blueman Group at the Panasonic Theatre at Yonge and Bloor. This was a spectacular show. It had great music, brilliant visuals, and was absolutely hilarious. I really can't say anything else to describe it because it is just so eclectic that you really have to see it for yourself to understand it. I went with a bunch of people from my church. We met after work on Thursday at a pub in the area of the theatre, then hiked it down to the show. We had enough people for an entire row plus some so it was a blast.

Today I golfed at Angus Glen. We played the South Course which was the site of the 2002 Bell Canadian Open. Golfing at a place like this is a real treat. While you're still at your car, a "shuttle" is making rounds in the parking lot. They offer to take you and your clubs to the clubhouse, practice green, or driving range. I hit the range, where you can hit as many balls as you want to warm up for your round. I met up with Hawley and Jeffery and we proceeded to critique each other's swing. After, we headed down to the clubhouse to check in and pay then make our way to the starter's area. They took our clubs from us and carried them down to the cart area to load them onto the carts that were already set up with scorecard, course navigation booklet, water, and tees. It was a super hot day but it was a great round with the two guys plus Drew, and the course was in great shape. After the round, you can use the clubhouse locker room facilities complete with showers, towels and almost any grooming product you might need. It's like being part of a private club for a day.

This evening I went back downtown in the Tdot for another show. I met my Mum, Step-Dad, Sis and BiL for Martin Short's show: Fame Becomes Me at the Canon Theatre. I thought this show was fantastic. I will say that you do have to be a Martin Short fan, but if you are, you will enjoy yourself.

Tomorrow I go back to my regularly scheduled life. The one not so full world-class golf courses, fine dining, and Broadway shows.

Unless my 6/49 numbers hit.

All for now,
Kef...

We Are Suck!

2006-06-15T16:28:00.000-04:00

It's official. My hockey team is suck. I might even go so far as to say we are THE suck. (Actually we are the Cyclones, but I'm trying to paint a picture here.) We played two games this week and we are still 0fer. That's 0fer 7 if you are counting.

Now I know that there always has to be one team that is the bottom of the pack, I just didn't want it to be us. I think my biggest problem is that I am the goalie so this whole losing every game thing reflects pretty badly on me. Granted not every goal is my fault, but they do all go against me. In fact you can see that if you look at my "Goals Against Average." You can also see that my "Save Percentage" is suck. It does get a little tiring when there are upwards of fifteen breakaways or two on ones a game.

Enough complaining though. Last night the team's biggest problem was manpower. We started the game with only three subs on the bench and about midway through the first period one of our guys received his third penalty and was ejected. At one point in the last period James came over to me - nearly dead it seemed - and told me that he was on about a nine and a half minute shift. In a game where the running usually puts you at a one to two minute shift this was killer.

So, last night after the game, the Roomy and I did the only thing we could after going half the regular season without a win. We went and got ice cream!

Tell me that wasn't emotional eating.

All for now,
Kef...

Whoo hoo, Free Stuff!

2006-06-07T23:30:00.000-04:00

I need to go to bed so this is just something quick.

Apparently I won some patio furniture AND a lawn tractor! That's what it says in my email anyway...

Too bad I don't have a patio OR a lawn.

All for now,
Kef...

Riding with Heart

2006-06-06T23:11:00.000-04:00

The training has been going pretty well. I have not been as strict to the plan as I would have liked so the swimming has been lacking a little bit, but the running and biking have been going very well. This past weekend for instance, I did a LOT of biking.

On Sunday morning I participated in the 2006 Ride for Heart. This was a 75km bike ride to raise money for the Heart and Stroke Foundation. The ride left from Ontario Place at 6:45am and headed East along the Gardiner Expressway, then North on the Don Valley Parkway to York Mills Rd. (which is where I live,) then back down the DVP to Bloor, back up to York Mills, back down and across the Gardiner to Ontario Place where I started. It wasn't a race, but I made it one. I completed the 75km in 2 hours 44 minutes, which is a decent time for me. I found Kinch and his wife as I made my way down the DVP and we hooked up to form a team back along the Gardiner. We even picked up a couple more for our draft and really hammered it the last leg to the finish. It was a great event that saw thousands of riders cycling two of the Tdot busiest commuter routes.

I had a lot of people ask me why I was doing this as I was raising money and then later telling them about the ride. It is easy for me to raise money for a good cause. I don't have any problems asking people so long as I see the benefit and especially if I am subjecting myself to some kind of torture for the donation. This one is always close to the heart though, (so to speak,) as heart and stroke related problems have factored heavily into my family's lives. So, I'll give my answer to why I am doing this as five people.

1. My Grandad, my Mum's Dad that I never really knew. He died when I was about a year old due to heart failure.

2. My Nanna, my Mum's Mum, who has had triple bypass surgery and is still going strong.

3. My Uncle, my Mum's Brother, who had a stroke before he was 60 and survived.

4. My friend Martin, who at 25(ish) had an AVM rupture in his head putting him into a coma for several days, but has since made an incredible recovery.

5. Me. I figure if I can ride 75km averaging about 27.5km/h, then I am in decent shape and am giving myself a fighting chance at beating the hereditary aspects of Heart Disease.

The money was for them, and anyone else that it can help.

The ride was for me.

All for now,
Kef...

A Random TTC Story (or: A Tribute to the "Methadone Bus")

2006-06-03T22:13:00.000-04:00

Fellow blogger Sandra has a relatively new transit route in to work that seems to provide no end of blog worthy material. Reading of her often quirky rides on the "Methadone Bus" has inspired me to share something that happened to me recently.

I have had many experiences on the TTC over the years that I would count as memorable, (I may even share some of them one day.) The bus portion of my current ride to and from work each day is relatively uneventful. The 95 York Mills runs a route past two high schools and a junior high, so the bus is like, usually like, full of like, teenagers like, talking about like, teenager stuff. Sometimes they are loud but I think back ten years, (or more,) and remember that I was often part of the rowdy group on the bus or subway. This past week however something happened that I have never experienced in my nearly thirty years riding the rocket. Let me set the scene:

I got on at York Mills station, making my way home at the end of a busy day. I was near the front of the line so I got a seat on the bus that is usually akin to a sardine can. I like to read on the bus, and when I read I tend to lean forward slightly with my elbows on my thighs, (I am near sighted so I like to get my nose right in the book.) I don't usually pay attention to who is around me unless I know them or they are especially memorable. I happened to recognize a guy from my building on my left and there was some girl to my right.

About half way home, my back was getting a little stiff from leaning forward so I sat right up to stretch out. I felt something behind me so I looked to my left to discover a hand. The hand belonged to the girl on my right that had her arm around me. Needless to say this was a little strange to me. Yes, it is hard to keep to one's space while sitting shoulder to shoulder on public transit but this was a new level of closeness on the bus.

Even funnier was when I turned to glance at the girl after I noticed her hand, we made eye contact but she still made no move to pull her arm back within her own seat. My reaction was to shrug and go back to my book. It was too hot for me to care, she was kinda cute, and I don't remember the last time someone put their arm around me. When her and I got off at the same stop, I briefly considered asking her out for coffee or drinks, but something about her said dangerous so I just went home.

I'm just glad it wasn't the 300 lb. construction worker sitting to my right that day.

All for now,
Kef...

No Buses. Strike. Wildcat.

2006-05-29T23:21:00.000-04:00

This is the note I saw in the elevator when I was heading down this morning to catch the bus and subway into work at a little after seven. Seeing as it was a little after seven and I had not had any coffee yet, my first interpretation of this note had something to do with bowling, and really bad beer. (Wildcat is the bad beer...my uncle used to call it "Panther Piss.") A couple floors lower I clicked in to the actual meaning of the note but didn't believe it. When I entered the lobby of my building and saw a similar note on the door I started to get a little worried. So, I asked a girl that was sitting there in the lobby if she knew if it was true. "I've been sitting here for fifteen minutes and haven't seen a bus."

Crap.

Now I am sure that I am not the first Torontonian to blog about this, but for the sake of some of the people who stop by that are not from the Tdot, and for some like Sandra who I know are public transit commuters, I am going to give a brief explanation of what happened today.

Early this morning, union workers staged a Wildcat strike by blocking yards and not letting buses or trains out of their terminals, essentially shutting down the mass transit for all of Toronto, the biggest city in Canada and fifth largest in North America.

How did I not know about this? Oh yeah, I hate the news so I rarely listen or watch, especially on the weekend. And even the usual routine of lying in bed listening to morning radio was cut short this morning as I had to leave early. It's a good thing I did, too. I drove in and parked and had no problem. Some of the people on my team took upwards of two and three hours for a usual 30-40 minute commute. UGH!

And, it figures today is the first smog warning in Toronto. It was pretty gross, and I like the summer heat. At one point Kinch looked at the weather site and it said it was 42 degrees with the humidex. (That's about 110F for any Amarcans.) And, I swear it was hotter in the shade. That is the crazy thing here in the Tdot: on the sticky humid days, there is nowhere short of an air conditioned room that you can go to escape the heat. Like they say, it's not the heat, it's the stumidity. As if we needed another 500,000 cars on the road today, adding to the problems causing Global Coastal Flooding. They forced them back to work at about 3:00pm but a lot of good that would do considering everyone had already taken their car in today. Now the commute home has all these extra cars AND the fricken' buses!

But speaking of smog, today was a training day. Another brick. But, I couldn't bring myself to bike and run out in the blast furnace. So, I went to the gym to do it. There is good and bad in that. The bad is that I am not riding my bike, I am riding a stationary bike that is not set up the same and had bad pedals and probably a hundred other things that are not as good as a real bike. The good is that running on the treadmill gives me a chance to train at a constant pace and learn what that competitive pace feels like.

Enough of that, just thinking about it makes me feel like a marshmallow. My fan broke and I didn't go to the Tire today to get one like I'd planned. I think I'll go melt into my bed now.

The transit better be going tomorrow or I'm gonna... ok I got nothing, that was kind of an empty threat.

All for now,
Kef...

Global Warming? Sounds kind of nice.

2006-05-25T18:46:00.000-04:00

This is the problem we face with an issue that has the potential to be disastrous world wide. Marketing.

I was talking about this with my family a few weeks back but I was urged to write about it after seeing this article via BoingBoing. It seems that even the President, (of the United States if you were wondering,) has admitted that there is a problem with climate change and has urged us to stop arguing about the problem and start implementing a solution.

You see, it is not that surprising that people don't take Global Warming seriously. As my Dad put it, "Who wouldn't want it to be a little warmer? Sounds kind of nice." Marketing.

Society has been doing this for a while when it comes to the "accepted label" for a variety of issues. Unemployment Insurance became Employment Insurance, short people are Vertically Challenged, bald people are Follicly Challenged, etc. These make sense. They try to show these things in a more positive light, or at least give them a name that makes people feel a little better about their situation. I know I would rather be Temporally Gifted than old.

Kidding aside though, Global Warming is not something on which we want to shine a positive light. There is a danger that a climate change on a planetary scale could affect major population centres. This is where we need to hit the masses, with the fact that people will be affected negatively. That is why I propose a new name for Global Warming. A new marketing campaign as it were. One that will cause everyone to stop and consider the issue and even what they might do about it.

Global Coastal Flooding

Now I'm am not big on scare tactics usually - I think that some politicians do too much of this to advance their own agendas or justify military actions - but I think this is something on which we need to drastically change everyone's outlook. What are people going to be more worried about: that it will be five degrees warmer at any point during a year, or that Vancouver, Seattle, and Los Angeles could be under water?

Global Coastal Flooding. Think about it. Spread the word. Write a letter to your MP/Governor/Congressman. Start to do something about this problem before ozone is just something they put into designer bottled water.

Or, move to Colorado.

All for now,
Kef...

The Long Weekend!

2006-05-24T22:44:00.000-04:00

Is over...BOO!

Despite being cold, windy, and sometimes rainy, I had a great Victoria Day weekend. (Or, as most people call it, "The May 2-4") Saturday was sunny but windy. I was over helping the Beast and Kaibob with some stuff in their garden. I just called them up on a whim as I was out driving around and visiting some of my favourite stores, (GolfTown, Chapters, Starbucks,) and Kaibob says, "sure come on over, we're planting!" They didn't actually work me that hard and we had a good dinner afterwards. Later that same evening we went out to Linds and Hopper's place to play poker with a bunch of the crew. I was short stacked for a while but eventually was heads up with Beast and we were about even. He ended up beating me with a pocket pair'o'somethin's.

Sunday was cold and not sunny. In fact it was rainy and windy and down right miserable for most of the day. I was supposed to go up and golf with Michael at Cardinal, the West Course, but we cancelled once we got there. Still wasn't a complete loss of a day because we went to TJ's for wings.

Monday was golf again and this time we toughed it out. Pastor Steve, the Roomy and I went to Rolling Hills, the Championship Course. It was cold, windy, but luckily not raining. I didn't golf well at all but like they say, "A bad day golfing is better than a good day working." Incidentally, the Roomy beat me and PS both by two strokes...but I am not telling you what we shot.

Tuesday I took an extra day off. And what did I do on this extra day off? I golfed! I went up to Woodington Lake. It is a beautiful course up in Tottenham, (about an hour outside of Toronto.) When I got there I asked if they could get me on since I was by myself. The guy in the proshop says, "I think we can squeeze you in. The last group went off about 45 minutes ago and the next booked time is an hour from now." It was awesome. Like having my own private golf course. And despite not having any witnesses, I still didn't shoot very well: 97. I blame it on the fact that it was my first time there and it was still a little windy. I'm not too worried though. I'll be in shape for the Hargreaves Golf Classic, of which I am the defending champion.

So, even though today was the first day back at work, nothing was going to ruin the mood I had going on today. Lots of golf. Lots of sleep. Good times with friends. First day of work on Wednesday when they are kicking us out at noon on Friday to move us to a new floor. All of this makes for one of those bubbly, cheery, don't-you-just-want-to-smack-the-grin-off-his-face moods. Not even losing our second ball hockey game 4-1 can kill it. I kind of think I'd better go to bed so I can wake up the same way. I do feel a little bad because the Magazine Man is in the opposite kind of mood. Seems a little upset about the birthday this year. Something about middle age. Maybe I'll send him a big grin to try and snap him out of it.

Then duck so I don't get smacked!

All for now,
Kef...

Back in the saddle... er, net.

2006-05-17T23:27:00.000-04:00

Tonight saw my return to net for the start of the 2006 summer ball hockey league. It was my first competitive game since 2000.

That was back before I hurt my ankle and when I was somewhere in the range of 210 to 215 lbs. That was by no means my heaviest, (I made it all the way up to 240 after I hurt the ankle and got a desk job,) but the team I was playing on back then did call me the Buddha and rubbed my belly for luck before each game. That was a fun time. We came out every week and gave our best effort and lost almost every game. We did have a great time doing it though. We were playing with some good friends and even made good friends with the convener and sometimes ref in the league Peter. Before our first playoff game that year, Peter comes into our dressing room and Beast looks up and asks:

"So, what the word on our chances."

Peter responds, "Well, I've heard Slim and None. But, Slim left town."

He didn't mean it as a shot, in fact it got a laugh from everyone in the room. See, the thing with these kinds of leagues is everyone makes the playoffs, but the last place team has to face off against the first place team. Our goal differential for the other times we'd faced this team in the season was around -150, (or something...it was six years ago.)

Tonight was a different story though. I got out the equipment and loaded up the bag. I discovered I need a new bag. I put the new cage on the bucket, (that's helmet for you hosers in the US ;) I taped up the new stick. I get to the rink and donned the armor for battle, and realized that 35 lbs. makes the armor fit a little looser. But let me tell you, I can move now. We faced off against our rivals. We played hard for the two stop time periods of the game, (two not three, I think it's a ball hockey thing.) We lost 2-1.

Ok, so it wasn't a completely different story. I didn't feel too bad about this loss though. Half of our team just met tonight. We didn't have enough guys for a full bench, so they put some individuals that signed up for the league without a team with us and despite that, we played well together. The goals I let in weren't too bad either. One long shot that I was screened so I didn't see it until it was almost past me, and the second one I went down a little early thinking wrap around and he pulled back and picked the corner over my shoulder. Plus, Beast says he knows this team from last year and they beat his team in the semi-finals of tier one or two. We are supposed to be in tier four, so it may turn out that they are one of the better teams.

I just hope the shot off the inside of the foot doesn't hurt too bad tomorrow.

All for now,
Kef...

Bricks, two stacks of bricks

2006-05-10T23:52:00.000-04:00

That is what my legs felt like.

Tonight I did what they call a brick training session. It is a simple way for someone doing their first triathlon, (like me,) to get used to the feeling of getting off the bike after a hard ride and immediately going on to run several km. So, now I know the feeling.

Bricks.

Doesn't seem like such a strange name for a training session now. See, the problem lies in the way your legs are used for each of the bike and running disciplines. When you ride, you generally push through the power stroke on the pedal. Granted, with cycling shoes that clip to the pedals, (which I have,) you can get a good push over the top and even a bit of lift on the up stroke, but for the most part your legs are pushing in a circular motion. Then you get off the bike, put on your runners and try and switch your legs to more like a swinging, pounding motion. (I am sure there is a better way to describe that but I can't come up with one right now.) Making that switch is a fight. I almost tripped over my own toes a couple of times in the first km because I didn't feel like I could get my feet up off the ground.

Once I transitioned fully into running mode however, I felt pretty good. I did about 14km on the bike and then a 3km run and I didn't feel winded at all. I am still working on picking up my pace a bit on the run but I think I can do it because I felt like I had lots left in the tank today. My pace was off a bit due to fighting the bike legs, and due to the wind being mostly in my face on the first two thirds, uphill portion of my run.

I have to remember to order no wind for race day.

All for now,
Kef...

Ok, one more!

2006-05-05T17:06:00.000-04:00

I have to do one more Retrans. (I am hereby coining my fun as Retransing: the act by which one translates text to a foreign language and then retranslates it back to the original language using an online translation program.)

Here is a favourite song of mine. If you guess it first, you get a prize. The [something]'s are parts that actually got stuck in the foreign language. I find it strange that it could go from English, but there was no available translation back.

Also, if you see the Ohio state and think that might be a clue, think again. I have NO idea where that came from because the song makes no reference to Ohio or any other of the 49 United States. Baffling.

The light/write you go out, I rescue ask,
defend and when me trying the fact
that it re-arranges, me my knee,
can in order to put me in Ohio state which I ask sing.

Coming out of the fact that it is not said,
you shoot the apple trouble and my head
which cannot show from [something]
which it waits because you are domesticated separated and sing

Certain. Certain. Certain. Certain.

It does not stop confusion under any condition.
The wall of closing and the clock which builds [something] sound,
returning, taking the house it goes.
Now having known be able to stop me, you sing.

I was denounced my sea of remedy
of the sickness, in the opportunity
which is let escape the part,
or to be, me you divide and start, sing.
[whoa, this verse actually rymes!]

Certain. Certain. Certain. Certain.

And it compares what.
And it compares what.
And it compares what.

Certain. Certain. Certain. Certain.

When you think that I would like to go, the house house.
When you think that I would like to go, the house house.
When you think that I would like to go, the house house.
When you think that I would like to go, the house house.

Nice! If you know the song it actually sings along quite well to the original music. But now I promise I'll stop,

For today at least.

All for now,
Cabin...
[yes, when I retrans my name it comes back as Cabin...go figure!]

Web sight of my present taste

2006-05-05T00:00:00.000-04:00

I don't know if I have mentioned it before, but there is a website with which I am - I can't think of the best adjective here, I'll go with - enthralled. This website is Altavista's Babelfish. This is a useful site for some quick translation work. I have used it several times when I come across a tidbit of information in other than my native tongue, or if I need help with my rusty high school French, like when I got my new bike. The bike was made by a small company in Quebec and the manual is only in French. Some of the more technical terms were escaping me and I didn't want to read, "Proper use of this bicycle requires one to X" when it actually read, "You may die if you try X."

But, there is a much less useful, but much more amusing way to use this wonderful tool so generously provided to us by the folks at Altavista, (by Overture Services, Inc. Owned by Yahoo, (don't they make a search engine, too?)) The hilarity of which I speak is accomplished as follows:

1) Type any English phrase, (or short paragraph,) into the Translate box.
2) Select a foreign language for translation purposes and receive the result.
3) Copy the result back into the Translate box and go back to English.
4) ROFLYFAO (which of course is roll on floor laughing YOUR friggin' ass off)

I can seriously spend upwards of tens of minutes at this, (I was going to say hours but I am not that big a nerd...shut up JWE.) I usually fall back to song lyrics and then try to sing the result along to the music, or I come up with challenges or insults that I can then send off to various friends/enemies. I find the Asian languages work the best, probably because their syntax is so different from English.

Here are some examples using what should be familiar text:

Humpty Dumpty was put in the wall
Not too bad here
Humpty Dumpty passed falling which is large
um, kinda losing me here
As for the person of the horse or all kings of all kings
ok, it's gone
it was not possible for the second time to assemble Humpty
Hey, we brought it back, although it no longer rhymes

Here is a song. Bonus points if you know what it is before seeing the answer, (which I have "hidden" later.)

Keep accompanying me in circumstance.
Keep accompanying me in crowd.
Certain peanut and popcorn buy.
If I return, you do not worry.
We in order to become fixed, become fixed in order to support the foam. [??]
If they do not win, that is shame.
Because of that with you of one and 2 are three assaults which is old circumstance.

And finally, a tongue twister with a unique...ok, twist.

Peter's Piper chose peck of the pepper which makes the pickles.
When it chooses peck of the pepper which makes the pickles which have peck of Piper which makes Peter's of the pepper where Peter's Piper is chosen pickles.

Wow. Ok, I should go to bed before this gets out of hand.

For the present entirely,
Kef...

ps. here is the answer, (highlight this: [Take me out to the ball game])

What do you call a ten foot putt for birdie?

2006-04-29T22:14:00.000-04:00

A friggin' three putt for a bogey. Dagburnrasafrasa...

I love golf. Have I mentioned that before? Today I was out golfing with Mr. Team 188 himself. Harrison and I played the West Course at Cardinal today. Despite the almost hour frost delay, (yes it is still cold enough up here to have frost in the morning,) it ended up being a great day. Maybe a little windy, but nothing I couldn't handle. I didn't have a great round, 94 on the par 71, but I can pinpoint a few spots that I can clean up in the game right away. A few of these for example are the one I put in a pond, a couple of three puts, and the three or four times I let Harrison get in my head.

Note to anyone else that ever golfs with me: I am very susceptible to mind games. Perfect example from today: I am near the green in a little bit of rough and the pin is close to my edge. Harrison says, "What kind of shot are you playing?" I reply by telling him I am going to flop it on with my trouble wedge, (I have this nice Wilson loft wedge, 64deg loft with a copper insert, blah blah blah, ok I'll stop talking about my clubs like a golf nerd now.) He says, "Hmm, that's a tough shot, take a good feel." Now let me explain quickly that this is one of my best shots. Pop it straight up in the air, land 10-20 yards out depending on what I need, and roll a little bit to stop near the pin. Well after Numpty's little comment there I start thinking, "Yeah, this is a hard shot. Maybe I should be careful. Maybe I should try a different shot. No, I'm good at this one, no worries." I then proceed to hit it thin and knock it clear across the green under a tree. grrrr. Despite that I had a good time. It's nice to hang out with people from the old work team even though I have moved on. It reminds me that we became friends, not just work colleagues.

The other thing I did today was get burnt! I golfed yesterday, too with Big Al up at Bloomington and it was similar weather. So, two days golfing when it is still kind of cool but clear and sunny and now my neck, ears and face are all a little crispy. Luckily it was cool enough that I had to wear long sleeves so I didn't fry the arms as well.

Tomorrow is supposed to be the official start of the twelve week training program for the Triathlon, and already I think I may need to modify. You see, I promised Mo I would help her move and that is tomorrow so I may just need to move my first official swim to Monday which should be a gym or off day. I don't want to skimp on the swim sessions for sure. I went to the pool last week for lane swim and realized something. There is some work that needs to be done in the pool. I am not too worried though because Kinch seems to think that the swimming is the quickest to come of the three events. This is comforting because I am already getting more confident on the run, and my new bike is WAY fast.

Now I just need to string it all together.

All for now,
Kef...

Happy St. George's Day!

2006-04-23T22:51:00.000-04:00

That's right, it is April 23 and that means that it is St. George's Day! As I have mentioned before, I am not Irish so I don't celebrate that green day in March but I did keep my promise and had the "First Annual St. George's Day Bash at Kef's Place!"

I had some good English fare like: Bangers and Mash, Toad in the Hole, and Bubble and Squeak. (For those now making the "HUH?!" face, that is: Sausages and mashed potatoes, Sausages in Yorkshire Pudding, and fried cabbage and mashed potato.) I also added a more modern English pub favourite with a vegetable curry. Nibblers included a few plates of crisps and some pickled herring. I know, that is more Scandinavian but I like it better than kippered herring. I of course had the fridge stocked with some Tetley's (Ale, not tea) and some Bass (again, Ale not fish) and some Sleaman's Silver Creek in case any guests didn't like the English Ales, which didn't happen.

Between the food and drink, putting out the flags, and just getting everyone together, that was the basis for the party. But, what more could you ask for than having your friends around with good food and drink? The St. George's Day theme was just an excuse to bring everyone together and it worked, (for the most part, not everyone could make it.)

It led me however to a realization that there are very few people, even those of English descent, who know very much about what I was doing with the flags and the food and everything. Several times the last few days I had to explain who St. George was, (I never have to explain who St. Patrick was.) And, I had to explain a couple times today what flag I had in the window. Yes, St. George's Cross is the flag of England. No, the Union Jack is the flag for all of Great Britain. That's ok, a lot of North American's are separated from their roots so I can't really hold it against them.

I had a lot of people stuffed into the apartment today. The Beast, Kaibob, Hopper, Linds, Boomer, Ryguy, Angel, JWE, Cous, Mira, Ames, Irek (best I can do, his name is already a nickname,) Noble, and oh yeah, the Roomy was there, too. I was having such a good time cooking and socializing however, that I forgot to get the camera out until most of the people were already gone. I did get a few shots of the Roomy and Noble GF cleaning up, (and Cous doing dishes...I don't know why he is trying to lick Noble.) Mira and I stayed out of the kitchen as it is too small for five. (It is too small for three but oh well.)

I am taking suggestions for the excuse to have the next party.

All for now,
Kef...

Easter Stuffing

2006-04-16T23:24:00.000-04:00

We ate ham for Easter dinner so there was no stuffing, because you can't stuff a ham, or shouldn't anyway. What one can stuff however is one's face. I ate too much food this weekend. I was down at my Dad's place in Belleville for the Easter weekend. It was nice to get away from the big smoke for a couple days and out to the County, (Prince Edward County to be specific.)

Since it is spring, by Brother in Law, (him and the Sis were there, too, obviously,) and I got roped into helping a couple of neighbours with their docks. I guess it is one of those small community on the water things. Those who can help those who can't do it by themselves anymore. My Dad seems to be the handyman of the neighbourhood and is always being asked to help fix or install something. Working on the docks wasn't too bad though. After each short round of work, (many hands makes light dock planks...or something,) we were invited to stay a while and drink a beer. The beer of course is the lake and cottage community universal currency for services rendered. The second dock also had a bonus Mexican dip, fruit tray, and caramel nuts thrown in.

Ah yes, the food. In addition to the great home cooked meals of ham, scalloped potatoes, parsnips and baked beans, and on another night corned beef and cabbage, I also ate more cheesecake, cookies, brownies, candy, etc. than I have eaten in a LONG time. I'll just say it was ok because: a) it was a Holiday, b) we worked on Saturday, and c) I still managed to run twice this weekend, once Saturday morning and again when I got back to the TDot tonight. Shouldn't hurt the plan TOO much. *wink*

To everyone who stops by, I hope you had a wonderful Easter weekend, (or are still having it if you are a teacher or student,) and that you had the opportunity to stuff yourself on a marvelous feast like I did.

Now where's that chocolate bunny?

All for now,
Kef...

Three sports...all at once?

2006-04-13T23:27:00.000-04:00

Wow, Blogger is sluggish tonight. Must be lots of nerds like me home on a quasi-Friday night.

Anyway, I want to give you all, (I should probably say you both, but I think a third person reads this every once in a while,) an update. The November Resolution has transformed a bit. I have been doing so well since Christmas that I have hit a low that I don't think I have seen since high school.

I am under 180 lbs!

Considering that a little over three years ago I was a slightly rounder 240. Yes, I have lost a quarter of a former me, and 20 lbs of that has been since the November Resolution started. I am not really looking to lose too much more weight at this point, but I do have a little bit extra stuff around the middle. I don't know why they call it "love handles" because I don't love it, and I really don't know any chicks that dig it either.

But, I mentioned a transformation. The November Resolution is changing and will henceforth be known as:

Training for a Triathlon

That's right, I am now getting this body into peak, (read: as good as I can,) physical condition for the Parry Sound Triathlon & Duathlon Weekend. I had been thinking about this for a while. I have been doing the spin classes for a while and I have always been a decent swimmer so all I had to add is the run, which is only 5.5km. A sprint triathlon, (incidentally, did you know that there is only one A in triathlon? I always thought it was "triathalon") is a 750m swim, 25km bike, and 5.5km run. The swim is no problem, we do nearly 20km on the bike in my spin class and I won't have to work near as hard as there, and I have already been doing almost 3km runs every other day without even being winded. Easy!

(he says now...)

I say easy because I put it in perspective with the triathlon event with which a lot of people are familiar. The Ironman. This even is like 4km swim, 180km bike, and 42.2km run, (which is a full marathon by the way, after swimming and biking!) A colleague on the new team at work has been in some of these sprint events and said he enjoyed it so I made up my mind then and there.

Now, I just have to talk Cous into joining me as his cottage is in the Sound.

All for now,
Kef...

OK, Blue Jays, Let's Play Ball!

2006-04-06T17:28:00.000-04:00

I went and saw the home opener for the Jays on Tuesday night. They started off the season with a bang down at the Skydome, (I'll never get used to calling it the Roger's Centre. In fact, I corrected the stadium announcer every time he said it.) They celebrated the team's 30th year with a short video which was a montage of clips from when they started in 1977 to now. It included key players from each year and highlights from each season, from Dave Steib pitching his no hitter to back to back world series in '92 '93 to four of the last ten American League Cy Young Awards.

They followed that up with a touching tribute to Tom Cheek, the man who called every jays game from April 7, 1977 to June 3, 2002, an incredible streak of 4306 games. He passed away due to cancer last year at the age of 66. Later, his wife was on hand to throw out the ceremonial first pitch of the season, caught by my favourite catcher Ernie Whitt, (or Ernie W. Hitt as we called him.)

The boys took the field and played a great game. Halliday pitched well, and despite giving up two solo home runs in six and seven, he came away with the win and one of the new boys B.J. Ryan got the save. Jays home runs were put up by Bengie Molina and Alex Rios which of course added to the excitement. I think this is the first year in about ten that I have actually been excited to see the baseball season start and I have already planned to hit a few more games this season.

Good thing I didn't go last night, they got spanked!

All for now,
Kef...

Back to School

2006-04-04T00:10:00.000-04:00

So I went back to high school today. One of the girls in my youth group asked me to help with a project in her business class by being a guest speaker. So I got to go in for first period on a Monday and talk to a handful of teens about the Tire and of all things, business ethics. I have to admit that when I thought about this topic I wasn't too keen, but soon realized that it was interesting enough and I had a LOT of examples from my own workplace. I was so nervous about going in for the presentation though because I was worried that if I did poorly, that Turkey and the rest of her group would fail. Ms. Nelson assured me that that would not happen.

I did have a bit of fun preparing and getting myself to the school early on a Monday morning however. I figured since I was going back to school to present that I should prepare the presentation well ahead of time so as not to disappoint one of my youth. Of course seeing as it was high school to which I was returning, the natural procrastinator that I am really shone through. I mean, don't get me wrong, I had all my ideas laid out in my head. I just needed to research, organize, and form some dialogue to go along with said ideas. I did most of that after the Raptors game Sunday night. It's amazing what I will do to put off school work. I never sit and watch an entire NBA game unless I go to the ACC. Preparing late into the night, (early morning,) also caused me to be a little on edge about when I had to be there. To be at the school at 9:00 is not a big deal, but on the first Sunday night of Daylight Savings, staying up late and being nervous about waking up, and being nervous about the presentation itself all led to a restless sleep. The building fire alarm going off at 4am and continuing for half an hour didn't help either! Apparently someone set fire to the dumpster behind the building. I never thought to ask the Roomy about it. He parks his car back there.

Despite all that, I arrived at school in plenty of time, the presentation went well, and the girls presented me with a nice card and a small gift as a token of appreciation. This was way more than was necessary as I had a blast just being back at school and being away from work for a few hours. Thanks Turkey!

Oh yeah, I got to write on the blackboard!

All for now,
Kef...

One view of home

2006-03-30T00:23:00.000-05:00

I live on the eighteenth. This is about as far away as you can get.

On another view of home: I had to replace both of the light bulbs in my room last night. One went about three or four days ago and I had been living dim. Yesterday the other one went and I had to replace them. I replaced them with a higher wattage bulb obviously because my room is super bright. I can't even look directly at the fixture in the centre of the ceiling else I have a blind spot.

I think I'll go try for a bit of an early season tan.

All for now,
Kef...

Another one coming

2006-03-28T22:28:00.000-05:00

Saturday we went out for dinner for a couple of good friends Ames and Irek. See, they are getting married in October. GAH! Another wedding! Oh well, it is bound to keep happening until all my friends are paired off. Then it'll start being all the kids that have been in my youth group...

Anyway, we went to Montana's for dinner. I like it there...usually. I mean I had great food as always, Anojitos to start, then a gigantic burger with BBQ sauce and cheese and mushrooms, mmmmmm. But, the waiter was unbelievable. I'll say that again for emphasis like the Roomy would.

UN-believable!

There were several times during the evening that I just wanted to say, "Stop talking! Please. Thanks." He had that way of dragging out every word he said so that you never knew when he was ending a sentence or even a word for that matter. And, he must have apologized three trillion times and thanked us for being patient a few more than that.

Enough of that though, I could blog all night about the waiters that I have had at restaurants. (Hmm, that might be a good idea.) After dinner we went back to the eggheads and played Cranium. I was on a team with Linds and Hopper and we pulled into an early lead.

But then he got squared and they had to leave.

Actually they had to leave to get Jordan, but regarless I got put onto Miriamiam and Boomer's team. We won, so we are the champs! The win came on an all play Humdinger. Boomy had to hum "Eye of the Tiger" and I got it because the song rules and everyone should know it. Of course it is a sticky song so it was in my head for the rest of the night.

So, when all was said and done, everyone had a load of fun and went home happy, (or was crying because they lost to our fantastic team!)

Congrats again Amy and Irek. I love you guys.

All for now,
Kef...

What time is it?

2006-03-28T00:37:00.000-05:00

So, I've gotten myself into a habit of staying up late again. grrrr

I had a couple of days off at the end of last week for my birthday, (nobody should ever have to work on their birthday,) and I started staying up past midnight watching movies or playing games. Now I can't sleep. This is frustrating because I like to go to the gym in the morning. I went after work today and tried to tire myself out in hopes of moving back the hour a bit but here I sit blogging at 12:04.

Next I try the book. The problem with that one is it's a good one. Inkheart by Cornelia Funke. I highly recommend it. Or, the one I read right before it: Eragon, by Christopher Paolini...

Anyway, as I was writing this my ENFP self got distracted and it is now 12:36 and I feel a little tired.

Next on the list was warm milk.

All for now,
Kef...

An Evening Uptown

2006-03-25T23:21:00.000-05:00

Seeing as it was my birthday this past week, (the only time I can say I am 29 and not be lying!) I spent Monday evening out with a good friend in the Yonge and Eglinton area. It's not downtown in the Tdot, that would be south of Bloor, but uptown. I work around this area so I know it pretty well.

There is some decent shopping in the area.

There are also lots of good places to eat in this area including:
The Rose and Crown

Ho Su, and the Dim Sum shop

And my favourite, Sushi Rock Cafe. (East side of Yonge, one block north of Eglinton)

Great food and they have recently done some renos so it looks great, too.

Here is my food being made, (excellent spicy salmon roll!)

Monday night is not a really busy night at the restaurants in the neighbourhood, but you do get the usual mix of locals, and those that don't know when the work day stops.

In addition to the restaurants, there are several places to get a good coffee after dinner. Well, I should say there are several Starbucks and Tim Hortons. I am partial to Starbucks after a nice dinner, so I had to choose.
Here,

here,

or here.

You don't see it? How about now? If you can believe it, I can see all three of these shops from the northwest corner of Yonge and Eg without even squinting.

And here they are preparing my Quad Grande Cafe Americano...mmmmm.

After dropping my friend off, I needed a way to come down off the four shots of esspresso, so I headed over to the church to catch some friends playing hockey in a league run by Beast and the Roomy.

At this point I had come down enough to head home and think about sleeping. Thanks for tagging along on this short tour of Yonge and Eg. Next time I'll give you the day time tour.

And maybe I'll do it in style like this guy.

All for now,
Kef...

Is it that hard being green?

2006-03-17T21:05:00.000-05:00

Like most cities in North America, the Tdot goes crazy on the seventeenth of March every year. This year, since St. Patrick's Day falls on a Friday, there are any number of parties at which I could be drinking and dancing the night away. Irregardless of the fact that most of those parties are not my scene anyway, I don't find myself drawn out on this night. "But everyone is Irish on St. Paddy's Day," one work colleague expressed to me this morning. Not me, I'm English. (Mostly, anyway.) In fact I wore my English team football, (soccer,) sweater today just to bug those that take the day seriously or are actually Irish.

Maybe it was growing up listening to my Nanna on my Mum's side. She is English. Born, raised and lived there until she met my Grandad while he served in the Royal Canadian Air Force during World War II. I always remember people asking her where her green clothing was on St. Patrick's Day. "Don't be ridiculous," she'd say, "I'm not Irish!" So there I was today, walking around seeing everyone else decked out in their green sweaters, green t-shirts, green scarves, green pants or green overcoats, and every time I saw something green, I proudly puffed out my chest displaying St. George's Cross.

Which brings me to another point. Does anyone know what April 23rd is? It is St. George's Day! This year I am going to have a party on April 23rd. I am going to put up my flags, serve fish and chips, bangers and mash, and Cornish Pasties and wash them down with a Bass, Newcastle or a Young's RamRod Special Bitter, all the while listening to traditional English music. (I think I have more than a few Beatles CDs!)

I looked into what a St. George's Day celebration might look like and to my horror I discovered that it is not even a Holiday in England! All of bloody North America drinks green beer on March 17th but not even the banks get April 23rd off in England! Well I plan on making a big deal of this and anyone who wants to, can come. This day will not be a secret anymore because I am telling a crowd to be here Sunday, April 23rd for the First Annual St. George's Day Bash at Kef's Place!

I guess I'd better tell the Roomy there's gonna be a crowd here.

All for now,
Kef...

New Job?

2006-03-14T13:27:00.000-05:00

Well, this should be the second day of the new job at the Tire. That's right, I got a new job. Just when I thought I was comfortable with what I was doing and I was getting really good at it, an opportunity came up in another division. It's a good opportunity, an exciting job with a chance to get in and fix some things so I am looking forward to it. But, it is more change at work that I am a little apprehensive about right now. I like Team 188 and I'll miss them, but I think that you can't afford to get too comfortable. Plus, when a chance comes up to take on more responsibility and show off your mad skills, you take it.

Anyway, the point of this is that it is SUPPOSED to be my second day of the new job. I spent it doing the old job. There are always some tricky timing issues when it comes to moving into a new role and moving someone into the spot you are leaving. Also, with Truman leaving last week and Colic off for a few days, I really didn't want to leave Harrison in the lurch. (He was asking about the site today so he'll probably see this, which is a little embarrassing considering the last sappy post...)

A quick update for those of you following the November Resolution. I broke through the 190lb mark this Monday! This is the first time in about eight or nine years that I have been that low. Keep in mind I am not bragging, but hoping I am being an encouragement to others by proving that even my lazy ass can get into shape.

Curling playoffs continue tonight. Stay tuned.

All for now,
Kef...

Goodbye Truman!

2006-03-09T21:57:00.000-05:00

It was a sad day for Team 188 at the Tire. Today was the first day that we were without Truman. You see she decided that it was time to get out of the Tdot, move closer to her boyfriend The Pete, and basically move forward with her life in a way that didn't revolve around only her career. I applaud her for that. For the determination, the strength, and pure guts it takes to do that.

But, I now know the meaning of bittersweet. Like the rain that came down today on a warm spring-like day in TO, so were the tears that came down as I lost my best friend at the Tire. Happy for her but sad for me...

She has been there as long as I have been an SCA down at home office. Granted that was only two years but that is long enough in my career that has only spanned six or seven...

One of the guys when I needed to talk sports, but the true voice of honesty and reason when I needed advice with the fairer sex...

A smile that could light up the cube. And, even when there was Grumpy I knew I could make her laugh... (no grumpy!)

As long as it took to get to know you Truman, I don't know what we're going to do now that you're gone. Don't forget about us up there in The Bay.

I'll miss you Nicole,
Kef...

Oh yeah I'm back, so, All for now.

Go Raps!

2006-01-29T23:12:00.000-05:00

I went to my first NBA Basketball game tonight! Yes I know, I live in a town that has had a basketball franchise for more than ten years and this is the first game I have seen live? What can I say, I pick lacrosse, hockey, football, and even baseball over basketball. It's hard to keep up in a town with five professional sports franchises. (Six if you count the Marlies, but I am talking major league teams here.)

I do have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed myself. The whole evening out with Maureen was wonderful in fact. We had a great dinner at Joe Badali's, (Black bean soup followed by chicken, mushroom and red pepper pesto penne. Maureen had a salad and butternut squash raviolli... mmm) Then, we made our way over to the ACC for the game between the Raptors and the Sacramento Kings.

Like the other Toronto teams playing right now, they had a good lead late into the fourth quarter, then gave it up to end the regulation time tied. Unlike the Leafs however, they pulled it out in overtime for a 124 to 123 win.

I'm just glad they beat Artest...the bum.

All for now,
Kef...

Sorry about that

2006-01-29T23:00:00.000-05:00

I do have to apologize. I don't know what came over me with the last post other than I was feeling just a little silly that night.

Funnily enough, that is not a new work. It is actually a reprint from something I found in an old journal. An old journal that ended up being a poetry and song lyrics book, with the occasional few pages of freeform writing. At one point I had actually shared this with my youth group and they decided that they wanted to act it out for one of our yearly events we call, "No Talent Night." I sat at the front in a fancy chair wearing a suit and holding a bubble pipe while about 10 or 12 of the youth "acted" out the story you see below. It was very funny to say the least.

I do this sometimes as a release. The writing that is. I start with a random thought, link it with a few more random thoughts, and eventually they start to shape a story, poem, or very silly song. Some of my friends, upon hearing some of these masterpieces, think that I am psychotic. I think it's fun. (The writing, not the psychosis.)

(I mean perceived psychosis.)

All for now,
Kef...

Don't let this happen

2006-01-27T23:07:00.000-05:00

The other day as I was leaving work I saw a little cow in the parking lot. I immediately thought to myself, "What the heck is a cow doing in the parking lot?" I didn't spend too much time on this obviously trivial matter however as there was a far more pressing situation to be attended to.

How was I going to get home?

Obviously I couldn't take my car because of the well known fact that I had been kidnapped by thirteen Scottish ping-pongers wearing hockey masks driving a Wesfalia that morning and my car was still at home. Nice guys. Fed me tea and crumpets with honey and the blindfold wasn't very tight, but I digress.

I considered walking, but the last time I did that, I was distracted by the sheer complexity of our urban landscape and missed the turn on to my street, resulting in my walking eighty-seven and a half kilometers out of my way, and finally realizing that I was no longer in what would traditionally be called a city, nor was I walking on what would traditionally be called a road, I hitched a ride with a family of reindeer farmers from Tomogamy, during which time I learned a great deal about how to survive in the foothills of Wales with nothing but a sharp stick and the boots on my feet, so walking was out of the question.

I contemplated taking a taxi cab, but then I found myself engaged in a debate with myself about the cost of a taxi cab ride and the fact that I had no money on me which would mean I would have to get the taxi cab driver to take me home to get my wallet, then out to a bank to get money to pay him, then back home, and I wondered whether it would be prudent to set up a cost benefit analysis of the scenario, but that proved difficult as the only basis that I had for the value of a ride home was the actual cost of a taxi cab ride home including the detours which led me to the conclusion that I should be indifferent about taking the taxi cab.

By this point the cow had come closer and I really didn't want to trouble myself with the cow so I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small package of jellybeans which I subsequently convinced the driver of a bus to take in place of the usual cash fare.

Stepping off the bus at a gas station I encountered a man that used to sell old shoelaces on the corner in the neighbourhood where I grew up. He offered me a ride in his Bentley stating that business had been good for the last few months. I conveyed to him that it would not be necessary as I was only steps away now from the late nineteenth century farm house in which I have a basement apartment.

Finally arriving home, I pick up the newspaper to see a headline of, "Mad cow mauls twenty-two year old dental hygenist in parking lot of local strip mall." I turn on the TV to the sports channel which was broadcasting highlights of the Scottish national table tennis team taking the World Cup when it is interrupted by a special report of a violent rally at city hall protesting the outlaw of reindeer farming in Northern Ontario.

The phone rings, "Hello? How are ya? What'd I do today? Not much. You?"

All for now,
Kef...

Laugh till my face hurts

2006-01-26T22:44:00.000-05:00

I found something that makes me laugh.

It makes me laugh every time I watch it.

Every time. Until my face hurts.

It is this video.

It looks like they ended up on some TV show and now they are some kind of celebrities. They have three other songs but this one is the best.

K, thanks,

All for now,
Kef...

I don't talk about politics

2006-01-23T22:52:00.000-05:00

I don't talk about politics. I don't talk about it on my blog. I don't talk about it with my family. I don't talk about it with my friends except for brief conversations that I try to avoid with some at work. Politics can be a very messy thing to talk about and can create arguments of which I don't like to be a part. I would rather talk sports with my friends. I would rather talk about my job, (which I think is great but would bore the heck out of some.) I would rather talk about religion.

But maybe I am doing my friends and family an injustice. Probably more my friends because my family is usually pretty well informed. My friends on the other hand know very little about politics or even how this great country of ours is run. Maybe if I did talk about our government more, there would be a better voter turn out and a better informed voter turn out. I am consistently amazed at the lack of knowledge around how our federal government is even structured. I mean, we learned about this in high school, but you'd figure enough of the basics would stick for people to know the difference between City Counsel, Provincial Parliament, and the Federal Parliament. Maybe if more people would get informed and vote, I wouldn't find myself grinding my teeth in frustration when a year from now people are complaining about a government that was chosen in an election in which they did not even cast a ballot.

So, on the eve of a new government here in Canada, the wonderful country I call home, we see ourselves faced with another minority. You see, a government can find itself in power even when it did not receive the most votes. For my American readers, this is much the same way the Electoral College of the Presidential Election works, however when American polls are finally counted, one person leads the country. Canada's Prime Minister is the current leader of the party in power with the most seats in the House of Commons, but that does not always put that person in controlling power. Having more seats does not mean you have more than everyone else, so as we have experienced for the last two years under a Liberal minority, the party in power may not have that much power. It is up in the air about the pros and cons of having a leader that must gain the support of at least one opposing party to have any resolutions passed, but my opinion is that these governments are less than effective. This may lower Canada's stock with the rest of the Superpowers of the world if their confidence in our leadership is wavering.

But reality is setting in. A lot of our country wanted a change, and with the Conservatives that is what they'll most likely get. Just remember that these are not the Brian Mulroney, Joe Clark Progressive Conservatives of years gone by. These are the Preston Manning, Stockwell Day Reformers that changed their name and sit much farther right on the slider. They are a Conservative party led by a slightly scary man named Stephen Harper. A man with a George-W-Bush-like, "I know something that you don't and I'm not going to tell you until it's much too late" smirk.

That was it. I'll go back to not talking about politics again.

All for now,
Kef...

To Fall...

2006-01-22T00:10:00.000-05:00

What happens when you fall?

You feel a jump
..........................that exciting feeling in the pit of your stomach
...............the rush, the sensation that stimulates you and can make you feel more alive

Sometimes is isn't just the initial jolt
.................it continues, lasts
...........Like an astronaut in orbit of the Earth
...............Freefalling
.................................falling endlessly to Earth
.......................but never coming closer

....................But to how many of us does that happen?
..............how many experience that feeling
..........................................When you fall, you fall towards something........You hit the ground
........The feeling ends, you land hard, and you get hurt
........................So be careful,
...........................................Watch your step,
...................................................................Falling hurts.

My November Resolution

2006-01-18T22:05:00.000-05:00

It is about that time of year when everyone starts to back out of their resolutions for the new year. Those lifestyle changes that were going to be turning point to becoming a lighter, healthier, or more active person. This was going to be the year that the resolution would become a regular, if not essential part of the daily or weekly routine. But, as with a lot of things in life, one discovers that this type of change requires a radical commitment, or sticktoitiveness if you will, and there is a level of work for which many are not prepared.

I really noticed the swing this year. The gym that I go to on a regular basis saw a significant influx of new attenders as we rolled over to '06. People of all shapes and sizes that decided this was their year. Sadly, as we came to the third Monday of this new year, many of these people have already started a trial separation with their gym. I can hope that they have found alternate times to work out or run the treadmill, but I get a sense from the general fullness of the fieldhouse that many have already been lost. It seems that New Year's resolutions are difficult to keep up. It feels like the right thing to do because it is the time of year for fresh starts, but people set big goals with strict deadlines without the support network to keep it up.

That is why I made a November Resolution. While lying in bed late one Sunday night I decided that my half-hearted attempts to get myself fit were not going to cut it anymore. Granted I am 40 lbs lighter than I was three years ago, but I had come to a bit of a plateau. I am a 200 lb man with about 27% body fat which is still considered overweight by the multitude of tables and standards that can be found on the web. I decided I would hit the gym hard. I decided I would eat right. I decided I would make some changes that would make me feel all around healthier and better about myself. I was partly inspired by Jennifer as she and her husband started to hit the gym around that time and were even working with a trainer.

Since then I have done very well with the activity portion of my resolution and moderately well with the eating right side. I make my dinner most nights and it usually consists of some type of chicken and vegetable. I take lunches most days and try to buy healthy on days I don't get a lunch together. I am not a hard-core calorie counter, but I am aware of my general food intake in relation to how much my body needs and I can pretty much tell you how much protein I eat each day, (which is important when you are trying to get huge, (said with tongue firmly in cheek.))

On the activity side I am starting to go a little nuts. I was already curling twice a week so I had a head start. I then started hitting the gym three times a week. It made me feel great and I actually felt like I had more energy. Next I found out that some friends play squash and one even has courts at his condo that never get used, so now add squash once a week. Also, since I got my new toy, I have been going to the range once a week. Then, yesterday I decided to mix it up at the gym a bit and I tried a spinning class. Wow, that was a work out and a half. This five foot nothin' girl leading the class by shouting into a mic while music is cranked and twenty to twenty-five people peddling their butts off. I liked it though, so I'll probably go back there tomorrow morning.

Oh, did I mention that I am actually going to the gym at 6:00am for these classes? Yeah, I don't know what's wrong with me either. Let's hope it pays off.

Which way to the beach?

All for now,
Kef...

The Neurotic One Turns...30?

2006-01-12T21:16:00.000-05:00

Today is a good friend's birthday. He is turning 30. Every year for as long as I can remember, (which probably means grade seven since that is when I met him,) I have missed his birthday by exactly one day. Every year but this one it has truly been a mistake. I call on January 13 and say happy birthday, then apologize when he tells me it was yesterday, and we move on into another year. This year for some reason I remembered. It might partly be because his wife has inadvertently reminded me a few times. They are planning a big bash in the summer exactly half way between both of their 30th birthdays so I don't need to worry that I might be missing a party tonight. I was thinking about calling him tonight, but it just doesn't seem right.

I'll call him tomorrow. It's what I do.

All for now,
Kef...

p.s. JWE if you are reading this: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I'll talk to you tomorrow.

New toy

2006-01-11T23:55:00.000-05:00

I tried out one of my new toys today.

No, not my chair. One that I had been kind of saving up to buy. Ok, so I took all my Christmas money and pooled it for one present for myself. But it is a good one.

The TaylorMade r7 Quad HT driver. I haven't hit a driver in several years. In fact I have not even had one in the bag for the past three or four years. But, this past summer I got myself a set of Taylor rac HT irons and a 3 and 5 VSteel fairway wood. I was hitting them all so well that I decided it was time to put the driver back in the bag. DB suggested that I look into the Aldila shaft as an upgrade, too. They had one already put together so they didn't even charge me the upgrade cost for the NV-65.

Anyway, enough technical mumbo-jumbo. Can I hit it? I went up to Launch tonight to check it out, and the answer is most definitely:

YES I CAN!

They really know how to make a club these days. I mean I am not the best of golfers, (high 80s or low 90s with one round of 79 last summer,) so I don't have the most consistent drive off the tee. But, try as I might, I could not get this club to hit off center. Maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration. I had a couple that I really opened up and one that I cranked around, but for the most part this new fangled club was really forgiving. And I haven't even started to play around with the movable weights to see what damage I can do with that yet!

Oh summer, where are you?

All for now,
Kef...

Chair: Some Assembly Required

2006-01-10T21:04:00.000-05:00

Sticking with the Christmas theme for just a little bit here.

My Mum got me a chair for Christmas. Doesn't it look amazing? It is a leather pedestal swivel recliner with matching ottoman. This is a great gift because it gives me another place to sit in my living room and it is a really cool place to sit at that! A couple of weeks ago I came home after being out somewhere, (for the life of me I have no idea where, but it is not important to the story,) and had a sudden urge to sit in my new chair. At that point it still looked like it does in this first picture. But, even though it was late, I was hyper and wanted, maybe even needed to sit in my new chair.

My first thought was, "How did they get the whole chair and ottoman into this box?" This was a logistical nightmare as that curvey metal piece you see wrapped in foam goes down and under the rest of the pieces at the bottom of the box. I was going to have to pull it all out at once. Did I mention it was late and my roommate was already in his room? I was pretty sure that he wasn't asleep yet so I was moving on.

My next thought as I started to pull the pre-assembled chair from the box was, "I have yet to see an instruction booklet." Now I consider myself pretty handy, but I am no fool when it comes to putting together foreign made furniture. You do it how they tell you to do it.

Luckily I found this stuck to the bottom of the foot rest. Notice that this is not really a book per se, but a single page with slightly ambiguous diagrams outlining how to piece together this wonderful chair with numbers, arrows, but not a single word. Worry point number one.

I was mildly amused by the job that was done when packaging this kit. See how they obviously partially assembled the more complicated parts for me, but only after they had pre-wrapped the seat base in plastic? Interesting.

So here was the chair after completely removing any and all packaging and / or protective coatings. I was now faced with turning this jumble of leather and metal into a functioning recliner, (swivel pedestal recliner,) using only:

That's right! Two Allen keys. You'd think Mum went to an old school Ikea to pick this one up. Anyway, these two unassuming tools were going to be used in conjunction with:

This small collection of hardware. It was at this point that I came to my Worry Point number two.

If we take a closer look at my instruction page, you can see the parts breakdown will at some point be calling for six washers, of varying sizes. Do me a favour and go back to the picture of the small collection of hardware. See any washers in there? Neither did I. Now I had a decision to make. Continue on, hoping the washers were a redundant part of this kit, or set the project aside and maybe get back to it next quarter.

I mentioned earlier that I was hyper, so I didn't want to wait. I boldly proceeded and eventually had a chair and matching ottoman that was identical to the photo on the side of the original packaging.

And this is me enjoying the comforts of said chair and matching ottoman. Incidentally, I had two of those short bolt and nut things still on the coffee table when I got finished.

Worry Point number three.

All for now,
Kef...

Wow I suck sometimes...

2006-01-10T00:59:00.000-05:00

I was curling in the Energizer this past weekend and we finished up tonight. We finished up tonight because I suck.

I made a bad call on the sweeping of the last rock in the second end. The other team ended up stealing three instead of us taking one. That four point swing kind of took me out of the game. I tried to stay in it but I am still stewing. BAH!

If you don't care about my curling, then come back tomorrow.

I'll probably be over it by then.

All for now,
Kef...

Canadian Boys are GOLD!

2006-01-06T09:08:00.000-05:00

Congrats boys!

The Canadian team won the World Junior Championship in British Columbia last night. They beat the Russians in a decisive 5-0 victory to take Gold for a second straight year.

When it comes to hockey, Canada still rocks.

All for now,
Kef...

Moving in Kingston - (HISMCV II)

2006-01-05T23:38:00.000-05:00

After finally leaving work on the Friday before Christmas, I could really get into Holiday mode. That is I could swear off shaving and dress shoes for the next ten days. I spent the rest of Friday afternoon at the mall. Did I mention that I love the mall at this time of year?! I love the crowds and the jostling. If someone bumps into me I just smile and say, "Don't worry about it. Merry Christmas!" I already told you what I did on Saturday in the afternoon. The evening of course was my family's traditional Christmas Eve dinner. Take-out Chinese Food. I can't tell you why and I really couldn't place when it actually started, but it is a tradition that we have carried on for years, and it is one of my favourite of the Holiday season. The funny part is that my parents have been apart for 22 years or so now and I have had the Christmas Eve Take-out Chinese with both the Mum and Dad families. For a while I thought everyone did it, but I have yet to meet someone with this cool a tradition in the family.

Christmas morning I got up and went to church before anyone else was out of bed. I was playing guitar in the band that morning so I had to go early for sound check and such. As a result of Christmas being on Sunday and my having to be there for the band, my Sis was forced to wait until after noon to open any presents. This was torture for her as she is the biggest six year old when it comes Christmas morning presents. (Incidentally she is 24.) She shakes every present under the tree and every year without fail she BEGS us to let her open "just one present" on Christmas Eve. We never let her. *evil grin* The pic is her and my BiL looking at one of the gifties.

This is my Mum surveying the damage.

This is the damage.

This is my Stepdad checking out one of the new books.

The rest of Christmas day is not documented because I didn't take my camera to my Aunt's place. That is all about that.

Boxing day I drove down to Belleville to see Dad and Stepmum. On the 27th, Sis decided she was going to do up the Christmas dinner again and she was going to do it all herself. Dad and Cheri weren't about to complain about this. She did a turkey and stuffing and yams and squash and potatoes and Bigos, (which is traditional hunter's stew originating in Poland. My BiL is Polish. The strange thing about this dish is it is cooked three times and actually gets better the more you reheat it. Oh those crazy Polish...) The whole dinner was pretty good considering how I feel about turkey. I even had to carve the turkey as my Dad wanted to only eat the meal and not be involved in the preparing in any way. He also wanted no part in the cleaning up which meant my BiL and I were at the sink for quite a while. Oh well, happy to do my part.

The next day was the move. My Sis and BiL live in Kingston and were moving from one apartment to another. They have a lot of stuff. They were sharing an apartment with another girl so a lot of their stuff was still at my Dad's place.

Their car,

my Dad's van,

and my car were packed to the gills with just the first trip from Belleville. There were two more van loads and two more of my car from their old apartment, then another two van loads to come from Belleville all told. They have enough stuff for a house packed into a two bedroom flat. It's nice though and they pay about half of what I pay for a two bedroom in the Tdot.

New Year's was awesome. I spent a couple days with JWE and Angel, (I'm not linking you guys until you update ;) ) We had two days of the best home cooked meals. Steaks on Friday, (GOOD steaks!) Omelets Saturday morning. Alaskan crab legs and mussels for New Year's Eve dinner. It seems like all I do is eat when I go over there. I am not complaining, but I owe them big for that weekend!

Plus we sat out in the hot tub minutes after the ball dropped. Can't beat that! That is JWE "getting the tub ready" for us. See the snow. Yeah, we got out and rolled in it then got back in the tub. Angie would have no part of it and just shook her head. Did I mention we were buddies in high school when it always seemed like a good idea to do stuff like that?

Anyway, back at work for a few days and already dreaming of the next Holiday.

I think I'll go surf the vacation websites.

All for now,
Kef...

How I spent my Christmas Vacation

2006-01-05T00:25:00.000-05:00

This work thing is for the dogs. I have been back for two days now and it really gets me thinking of the Christmas and New Year that just went by. I guess I'll reminisce a bit...

Before I went on Holiday I promised some pics from the office. I like to decorate my cube at work and here you can see how I try to bring some cheer to the office.

Since I had the camera out, I figured I'd snap some shots of the friends and neighbours at the quad, (or powercube as I like to call it.)

This is Trish. This is what I call her but I don't know if that is how she spells the short form of her name. That's ok though because she'll be way more pissed about the fact that I actually posted this pic than the name thing.

Colic always poses and smiles pretty for my pictures. Please don't look at how messy her cube is. The gas cans are killing us all slowly.

Truman on the other hand refused to turn around. I informed her that I would then take a picture of the back of her head and she said, "Fine!" After I took the picture however, she made me show her in case the back of her head looked funny. Girls...

Di Pede wasn't around so I couldn't get him. I did make my way out of the powercube to visit neighbouring pods for a while. This is Renata. She is pretending that she is working even though it is a little after noon on the last day of work before Christmas.

Warner on the other hand would have none of the pretending. "You excited about the Holiday Warner?" Response: see picture. Since this was taken, his wife had a baby boy. Mum, Dad, and little one are at home, all healthy and resting.

This is Afshan. (Did I mention that Warner was excited about the Holiday?)

This is Fennell, (one of six people I work with named Nicole, isn't that weird?) She will be mad that I posted this shot but I thought her hair looked cute in the pony tail and the one she made me take where she could pose and smile pretty didn't show that.

I better show that one, too. Incidentally, Fennell was a wild card entry into the Team 188 Bake Off. She isn't a part of Team 188 but she thought is was fun that we kept bringing desserts in so she wanted in. (Also she had some of every other entry since there was always left over.) She brought this nut, shortbread, cookie that was filled with caramel and drizzled with chocolate. It was really good. I haven't really heard from Di Pede what the final tally was but at last look, she was in the lead. She may get disqualified as an illegal entry though.

Well, I am tired and Blogger is giving me a hard time with the photos so this will have to continue tomorrow...

All for now,
Kef...

In Which I Buy Coffee for Sick Kids

2005-12-30T09:47:00.000-05:00

I made a promise to the Magazine Man. He sent me some crap, (although I don't think it is crap,) due to my winning bid in his Giveaway of Crap. My winning bid was not to buy coffee for sick kids as he said in one sleep deprived entry, but to start saving my coffee money and buy books for the kids at Toronto's Hospital for Sick Children. I told him I wanted to do this closer to Christmas as a gift to the kids that have to stay in the hospital over the Holiday. It is closer to Christmas than when I said that, but if we were playing by Price Is Right rules, I have gone over, (for the post that is, as the task itself was completed before Sunday.)

The week leading up to Christmas is usually a busy week for me. Like a lot of men, I don't believe that any Christmas shopping needs to be done before December 20. Mix that with the fact that the week was pretty much full to begin with and I was quickly running out of time. Monday there was a dinner outing with Team 188, (that is the podmates plus Harrison and the co-op,) Tuesday was my regular curling night, Wednesday was rehearsal, Thursday was the board meeting that was pushed to this week from the week before... You see? I had two days to shop for family and friends and complete my mission. (I don't know when it became a mission. Probably the tight timelines.) My delaying actually worked to my benefit however as my Sis and BiL were now in town. My Sis works with kids so she knows all about what is out there in the way of books and she also knows how to get the biggest bang for the buck at the bookstore.

The bucks I had were from several sources. As I had originally planned, I started saving part of my coffee money each week. I couldn't save it all or I wouldn't be in any state to do...well just about anything. I also received some help from some people at work. Finally, I collected my change. See, I am one of those people that collects all his change at the end of every day and after every two months or so, I can buy something. This is how I usually finance the new PlayStation games (nerd.) This time I held out and rolled my change for books.

With money in hand and my Sis at my side, I made a trip to the local Chapters. With her help, I was able to get nearly FORTY books for all ages of kid and many different interests. Stupid me didn't have the camera with me when I did all this but my Sis will vouch for me and I have the receipts.

I then dropped my Sis off and made the trip to downtown TO where the hospital is located. At first I thought that I would go in and visit one of the nursing stations and let them hand out books or ask someone where I should take them and go there myself. As I pulled into the underground parking however, I saw something that choked me up. There was a family, Mum, Dad, and two little ones, walking along, Dad carrying the youngest, all wearing Santa hats, but all looking a little sad. I don't like hospitals at the best of times, but when I saw this family and thought of all the little ones upstairs that wouldn't get to run downstairs and see that Santa had filled their stocking, eaten their cookies, and packed more presents under the tree than should possibly fit, I nearly broke down. I parked my car and took the elevator up to the main floor. I saw an information booth with some security guys behind it and made my way there. All I could squeak out was, "I have some books," as I lifted the bags up to the counter. The one guard smiled and said, "we can take those for you," and then he placed my bags with countless other toys, stuffed animals, and books that had already been donated. This made me feel a little better that these kids wouldn't be forgotten this Christmas, but still sad that there were so many here that needed to be remembered.

Hopefully this year we'll remember to say a prayer for those that can't celebrate the Holiday like the rest of us. Thanks for the inspiration MM.

All for now,
Kef...

Merry Christmas?

2005-12-26T23:26:00.000-05:00

I don't know about this one. It has been an interesting Christmas to say the least. I am not in the best of spirits. Definitely not the usual Holiday spirit anyway.

I am at my Dad's right now and he is on *crackle buzzzzzzzzz whistle* dial up so I am going to keep this pretty short until I get back to the big smoke. What's coming up?

Stay tuned for:

Coffee for Sick Kids
How I pay it forward for the Magazine Man.

My Little Green Book
I got a book from J.Sto. I'll tell you about it when I finish reading it.

Moving in Kingston
My Sis and BIL are moving to a new place in Kingston. I am going to help them. (woohoo)

Hopefully tomorrow is more fun...

All for now,
Kef...

Christmas Crazy

2005-12-20T23:12:00.000-05:00

Bah!

This past weekend was crazy busy! Saturday was dress rehearsal for the Sunday Choir Thing, (I think there may have actually been a name for the production but I was just doing the audio so I don't know what it was.) That was most of the day. Then Sunday morning. Then a pot luck with Synergy for lunch. Then back an hour or so later to help Giggles with a school project, (not complaining about this...it was actually kinda fun. Got to pretend I was a recording engineer for an afternoon.) Then the carol sing. Then editing Giggles' project. And, at that point I still had only bought one Christmas present. My Dad wrote me a not so subtle email basically telling me what to buy and when it was on sale.

Yesterday was mostly cool. (Colic upset me a little bit with her entry to the Bake Off, but I'll explain that later.) The team, (pod-team that is...plus Stewie...plus Harrison,) went for dinner at Summit House Grill for a little away from work socializing and merrymaking.

Today was a vendor visit so I was only in the office a short time. I was supposed to have the last curling game of the year as well, but the other team called me just as I was getting ready to leave the office to say they couldn't field a team. What a bummer. We had even planned to wear Santa hats and everything. But, this actually worked to my advantage:

As I am sitting, now bummed out about no curling, Truman declares she is going to the Eaton Centre and half jokingly asked if anyone wants to come with her. Well, seeing as I now have nowhere else to be, I tag along. I had no idea what I was going to buy, but this is usually how I do it. Each year, I wait until it is at least December twenty-something before I hit the malls. Call me crazy, but I LOVE the Christmas crowds, (as long as I am not working the retail floor, which I did for two years.) Anyway, it turns out that the Truman is some kind of Shopping Muse. She went with a list, or a mission if you will. "I need to go to these stores for these items then out." A very "man" way to shop if experience serves me. However, simply being in her presence (presents?) it seems, inspired me to leave the mall with a rather large, heavy bag full of gifts from various stores. I must refrain from elaborating lest any of the recipients are readers.

I have decided that in the future Truman must accompany me on shopping trips for the Holidays. It would get things done a lot faster and maybe sooner in the year if I plan one of these outings for Juneish of next year.

At least this means I didn't buy all the gifts at the Tire this year!

All for now,
Kef...

Well...there's the snow

2005-12-15T23:26:00.000-05:00

Yaaay! Snow! They say a whole whack is to fall overnight here in the T Dot and that means one thing:

If I wait at the bus stop for more that one hour tomorrow morning, I go back to bed.

All for now,
Kef...

Vancouver 2010, Here We Come!

2005-12-12T18:13:00.000-05:00

Yesterday Brad Gushue won the Canadian Men's Olympic Curling trials in Halifax. It was exciting to watch as any team that comes out of the Canadian Olympic trials for this sport is a definite favourite for the gold in Torino.

My friends Ang and Kev, (that's Kevin E Martin, more hair than the one on TV,) were there as spectators. They are the Skip and Vice on my mixed team so I am hoping they come back with lots of strategy ideas to bring to our games.

Also, Ken who is one of the other guys on my Men's team, knows Brad Gushue pretty well as he curled Juniors with him in Newfoundland. This is the calibre of player that I am playing with on a weekly basis.

So, the point of all this? Four years from now you can expect to see me on TSN for the round robin and CBC for the weekend playoffs of the Canadian Olympic Curling Trials for Vancouver 2010. Granted we have a LITTLE work to do as my Men's team is currently in the "F" division of the Tuesday Men's league at Leaside Curling Club. Unfortunately "F" is not for Fantastic. They label the divisions by letter with "A" being the elite curlers in the league.

They label them "A" through "F".

But four years is plenty of time to turn that around and make a run for gold...right?

All for now,
Kef...

Singing Mice?

2005-12-10T23:40:00.000-05:00

Dress rehearsal was today. Yes, I am in a musical. It is a Christmas themed musical of course at this time of year. We are doing the traditional Christmas, Birth of the Savior story in a kind of non-traditional way. The story is told from the point of view of a family of mice that traveled to Bethlehem with Mary and Joseph. Yes, it is a little surreal but did I mention it was a children's musical? A Mouse Christmas has four adult parts, Mama and Papa Mouse, Mary, and Joseph, (played by me,) then a whole whack of kids! It is so fun.

A couple of funny stories about telling people I know about the production:

After curling one Sunday, Mo asked what I was doing in the evening and I mentioned I had rehearsal for a children's musical. Her response: "Um, I hate to tell you this, but you aren't a child anymore."

The other one was when I was telling Colic about it. I had already told Truman about it and she was there, too:
Kef: I have rehearsal Sunday night
Colic: Oh yeah, tell me about this thing
Kef: It's the Christmas story told by mice, but I play a human
Truman: He's playing Jesus!
[short pause]
Truman: Oh wait, that's not right...
Kef: No, because then I would be in diapers, and nobody needs to see that.
[much laughter]

Anyway, Boomer and Kaibob have been working really hard with all the kids for them to learn their lines and the songs and everything, and this morning went really well for the most part, so I think it will be a great show. I just hope the bronchitis holds off as I have a solo piece in the show.

And now, in case the mental image didn't stick the first time you read it:

"No, because then I would be in diapers."

uthankyou

All for now,
Kef...

The Better Way?

2005-12-09T17:53:00.000-05:00

We had a bit of snow last night. It was 10cm or so, not enough to shut down a city. It did wreak havoc on my usual means of transportation into work however, so the following is a vent.

Toronto has a pretty good transit system. Their slogan is, "Take the Better Way." For the most part you can catch a bus or a train at any major street corner and get where you need to be in a reasonable amount of time. For the most part.

Today I left my apartment at 7:45 am. Granted that is a little later than I should have left on a snowy day, but we have had worse in past winters and I didn't think there would be too much of a problem. I sat down at my desk at the office at...

10:30!!

Yes 10:30am, two hours and forty-five minutes after I left my apartment. This is NOT a reasonable amount of time for a trip that usually takes forty minutes. I spent two of those hours with the other twenty people at my bus stop waiting for a bus to come by that was not packed to the doors. Bah!

Anyway, enough complaining. Round two of the bake off was today and the entries were as follows:

Di Pede - Easy Apple Crisp
This was an apple and pear dessert with a sweet crispy topping that consisted of margarine, brown sugar, cinnamon, and shredded wheat. Despite the shredded wheat it was really good. In fact, he put green and red sprinkles on the top as well to add to the Christmas theme.

Stewie the Co-op - White Chocolate Almond Truffle
MMMMMM...so good. Don't know what else to say. Most people could only eat half a piece.

Sats - Oreo Cake
He bought this from Dominion. He gets a ZERO for the second consecutive year.

I followed all these desserts up with a trip to Starbucks with Fennell to get a Grande Americano, so I am a little buzzy right now. I'd better go before I come down off the sugar/caffeine high.

All for now,
Kef...

Chronic Bronchitis

2005-12-08T07:40:00.000-05:00

A condition of the bronchial tree characterised by cough, hypersecretion of mucus, and expectoration of sputum over a long period of time, associated with frequent bronchial infection; usually due to inhalation, over a prolonged period, of air contaminated by dust or by noxious gases of combustion.

Not fun. I don't recommend it. Nobody wants expectorated sputum.

All for now,
Kef...

Christmas Spirit

2005-12-07T23:25:00.000-05:00

The office gang is starting to get into the Christmas spirit, and by that I mean that we have started the Annual Team 188 Bake-Off!

Last year there were some logistical errors, and a bit of controversy over this "friendly" little contest that we run:

1. Seeing as we had to judge every dessert but our own, we were faced with tasting 8-10 desserts in one afternoon. This may SOUND like a good idea to some but trust me, the ones you taste last lose simply because you are sick.

2. Someone entered store bought butter tarts into the contest. They might have got away with it except that they left it in the plastic tart tray.

3. I won't say whose entry it was, but the winner who entered a Tiramisu Trifle, had a LOT of help from Colic's sister.

This year Di Pede is in charge so he decided to mix it up a bit. To prevent the disaster of number one above, the participants were divided into several rounds. This was done by blind draw to prevent complaints about being entered on the same day as the Boss or as Colic and her Sister.

Today was round one. The entrants were as follows:

Truman - Krispie Mars Squares

This entry was basically somewhere in the range of 8-10 Mars bars melted down and blended with Rice Krispies with a layer of chocolate on top. It was very tasty if not a little sweet but an extremely good showing. It will be tough to beat. To make it better I might actually add more Krispies

Harrison (Mr. 188 himself) - Shortbread Caramel Bars

This is a repeat entry from last year, but is actually a team-wide favourite so it was made by request. Shortbread base, homemade chewy caramel middle layer, and chocolate topping. Another great dessert. Apparently there was some concern about a new pan that is larger than the old one, so it threw off the presentation a bit this year, but it still tasted amazing.

And finally, Moi - Caramel Chocolate Brownies

These were my favourite. Of course it is my Nana's recipe and my Mum makes them every year, so I may be a LITTLE biased. Actually, if I look back at the copy of the recipe card I have, the title of this dessert says "Choc Brownie - Caramels." It doesn't really roll off the tongue and I have it memorized anyway so I rarely look at the card. I tried to bring up the hype a bit by giving tastes to other people on the floor not involved in the contest but it is hard to say if that had any effect.

Anyway, there are three more rounds to go so we are far from crowning a winner, but I can honestly say we were three for three today. It's going to come down to a matter of opinion as the skill of all of today's competitors was clearly of the highest calibre.

Highest calibre of office bake-offs that is.

All for now,
Kef...

p.s. stay tuned for pics of cubicle decorations!

My Step-Mother is not an alien

2005-12-03T00:20:00.000-05:00

Hey...It's been a while. Stupid computer. Well, enough about that.

Last week I was down in Belleville and Kingston for a very special event. My Step-Mother Cheri was sworn in as a Canadian citizen! Cheri is from and still has most of her family in Iowa, but has living up here in Canada since I was in grade six, which is about eighteen years. She met my Dad in Florida when we were down there visiting my Grandparents who live in London and she was visiting an Uncle and Aunt from Ohio... Huh, this story is pretty complicated. I think I'll go back to the original one I was telling.

Thursday of last week I drove down to Belleville after work. When I got there, Cheri was a little surprised that I was there, but I said I had a few days off and I thought I would come visit for Thanksgiving. We all chatted for a bit then she tells me that we have to leave the house at 7am to drive to Kingston. I asked why, feigning ignorance, and she tells me about the ceremony. I couldn't keep the secret that Dad had already told me any longer so I told her that is why I was there. Cheri immediately yells at Dad then asks who else he told. Just my Sis and her Husband. So the next day we drive to Kingston and go to the city hall for her to register. Now the one thing about Cheri waiting as long as she did to decide to become a Canadian citizen, is that she didn't have to write a test. A lot of the other people there had to write a test about Canada to qualify for citizenship, but since Cheri is over...a certain age, she didn't have to write the test. (Incidentally, the test has questions like, "What are the capitals of the three Territories?" to which a lot of my friends that were born here responded, "There are three Territories?" Keep in mind that Nunavut is relatively new, (and the capital of that is Iqaluit.))

The ceremony itself was very official. There was a court clerk there to keep everything on track, an RCMP officer announced the start and marched everyone in, and it was presided over by a judge and attended by the Member of Parliament, Member of Provincial Parliament, and the Mayor of Kingston. Cheri was one of 47 people from 19 different countries that was sworn in that day. Over all it was really special and kind of exciting to see the people and hear all the countries from which they had come.

After, we went for lunch at Pan Chancho, (I've mentioned this place before as my Sis had her wedding dinner there,) then let my Sis and her Husband get to work and Dad, Cheri and I went back to Belleville.

So now I have the honour of having a Step-Mum that is both a citizen of Canada and the United States of America. I don't think a lot of people can say that.

Congrats Cheri!

All for now,
Kef...

I should blog about this!

2005-11-03T22:10:00.000-05:00

You ever have one of those moments where right in the middle of it you think to yourself,

"This would be so cool to blog about. I can't wait until I can sit down and do that!"

I had one of those moments last night. I took pictures and even thought about how I would work them in and how amazing the whole thing would be.

Too bad this was a dream.

The thing is, I felt so strongly about blogging about the event while dreaming it, I am going to anyway, (without the pictures of course.)

So we were at the zoo, and we were near the giraffes. It was a beautiful summer day, not a cloud in the sky and super hot. That kind of T.O. 30 in the sun, 35 in the shade kind of hot. They were getting ready for this big exhibition, celebrity boxing type event so there was a big platform set up where everything was going to take place. It wasn't a boxing ring because there were no ropes or turnbuckles or anything, (I like that word...turnbuckle) but more of a stage with padded tiles. My friend Chucky was there. I was helping him get ready for the match. We were taping his hands and putting on the gloves and making sure everything was in place. He was wearing the kind of trunks that Apollo Creed was wearing in Rocky. The strange thing is that although I was excited for Chucky, I really didn't want him to win the match. I wanted his opponent to win. You'll never guess who his opponent was.

Jeff Gordon

Yes, that Jeff Gordon.

Yes, driver of the Hendricks Racing Number 24 Dupont Chevrolet Malibu Jeff Gordon.

Anyway, I wanted my boy Jeff to win but the whole time I was taking pictures and thinking it would be so cool to have a picture of me and Jeff and Chucky after the match no matter who won. The match itself was really frustrating however, because both of the combatants were wearing baseball caps and big aviator sunglasses. It seemed like neither one of them really wanted to throw a punch because they were worried about breaking the glasses or knocking off the hats. There were three referees, but only one of them had the orange armband and I also found that frustrating because we were supposed to have switched to the two ref and two linesman system years ago.

At this point I began to think that things were getting a little weird. I must have been starting to wake up.

Finally, Jeff threw a good punch that knocked both the hat and sunglasses off of Chucky's head, and the referee called it. (One of the linesmen had had his arm up for a while on the delayed offside but there hadn't been a whistle.) I went to Chucky to ask him if he really wanted to quit and he said he had to because his nose was running.

I then turned around to see how the other spectators were doing and I noticed a trade show type booth and in it was Di Pede from work. He was selling snowmobile oil and he wanted me to get back to the office to make sure I was in stock. I think I mentioned it was summer right? Well that was finally it. The snowmobile oil on the hot summer day is what finally signaled to my brain that this wasn't real and I woke up.

I told this story to the powercube today, (minus Truman as she is down in Las Vegas at a trade show,) and received mixed reviews.

Colic just stared at me blankly. (I attribute it to jealousy because she didn't make the dream.)

Di Pede's response was different:

He asked me how his sales were at the booth.

All for now,
Kef...

Another Wedding and some Crap

2005-10-25T22:43:00.000-04:00

This past weekend my cousin Paul got married. That's him and his new wife Julie. Yes, I was at another wedding but it was a blast. I love weddings, and although this is up to...um...six or seven for this year, (considering I missed one,) I still had loads of fun. Paul is the sister of the cousin in whose wedding I experienced my most embarrassing moment. (If you click over to check, it is the faint and fall flat on my nose moment.)

It was cool of course to see the fam I don't see all that often.

Especially my crazy sister and her new husband!

I just got back from curling. Got our first win of the season tonight.

Eating pizza. Leftover from Sunday night. Do you think that two day old garlic dipping sauce is ok? It was in the fridge.

Just listened to a couple of Depeche Mode songs off the new album. (Thanks Jenn!) Definitely moved to the top of my CDs I need list.

And oh yeah! I got some crap in the mail!

Ok, I don't think it is crap, but that is what MM called it when he did his Giveaway of Crap. This is what was called a Crapload of Manga. I love Manga, a lot of the time for the almost complete randomness of the story ideas. In the picture you see the following:

1. Two books about some guys who race cars.

2. Four books about a girl that talks to giant bugs, (I love Nausicaa (I can't do an umlaut for the second A))

3. Two books about a Rabbit Samurai, (Ronin to be specific.)

4. A random book about cats.

5. My duvet cover from Ikea. Pretty stylish eh? Too bad the duvet in it is so stinkin' hot considering my apartment is always 28 Celcius, even in the winter. (Sorry, off topic.)

6. The customs slip that said I owed $2.80 in GST, (our Federal tax, man I love government,) and a $5.00 "Handling Fee."

This was a little annoying to have to pay tax on something that if originally purchased in the States would have already been taxed. The silver lining on this cloud however is the fact that they gave the books a somewhat arbitrary value of $40.00 when they opened and inspected them, instead of the over $200 face value of the eight volumes. That would have been $14.00 in redundant sales tax, which would still have not been too shabby considering Mr. M. Mann of Somewhere on the Masthead was kind enough to pay the shipping costs to me here in the Tdot from...somewhere...in the Midwest ;). And oh yeah, send me his books!

Anyway, I have some work to do now to "pay" for this wonderful stuff. (I was going to say crap, but couldn't do it because I am already enjoying it so much. Did you know the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are in one of the Usagi Yojimbo books?!)

If you read the Masthead, you'll know what I'm in for. If not, stay tuned. I have already recruited Truman, Colic and DiPede, (good friends from the Tire,) to help me in this endeavour, but we may wait a little to get closer to Christmas when it means a little more. (MM let me know if this is ok or if you are looking for immediate implementation.)

This next part better be fun to make up for cutting back on the coffee.

All for now,
Kef...

Update on the age thing

2005-10-21T00:30:00.000-04:00

OK, it's starting to freak me out.

I just found out that Artlad, (the son of Magazine Man,) is getting older too. Mind you, he is turning seven. Now this shouldn't be too much of an issue except he explains to us in his blog, (yes, this nearly seven-year-old has a blog,) that his birthday is in eleven days...from October 19...which is the thirtieth.

Thirtieth.

This reminded me that Truman's birthday, even though it is her twenty sixth, is also on the thirtieth.

Thirtieth.

And guess what post on this humble little blog started this entire, creepy little encounter with the number thirty:

Thirtieth.

Apparently my subconscious has no trepidation about getting older at all. It fears the number thirty. Ok, maybe I am just a little paranoid. Or maybe just weird, yeah we'll go with weird.

Well, it's 12:30, better get to bed.

All for now,
Kef...

I am twentysomething

2005-10-19T23:40:00.000-04:00

I have received a couple of comments about my profile excerpt which you can probably see a little to the right and up from here, (or a little right and a lot up if it is not October 19 or 20.) It seems some people (Mum) think that I am misrepresenting myself by describing myself as a "twentysomething".

I am Twenty-Eight.

There, it is out there now, but despite that, I am still twenty-"something". I'm not really sure what the big deal is. I am not clear on what my Mum meant by "misrepresenting myself" unless she thought that I was trying to pick up via a web log. Trust me, I am not blogging for dates, (though I am single and...what the?...stop it!)

There have been however, several incidents in the past couple of weeks that have drawn attention to the fact that I and the people around me are getting older:

1. My roommate turned 30. This shouldn't be a big problem for a guy right? I don't think it was. He gets teased a lot from the kids in SWAT and there was a sort of public humiliation involving the entire congregation singing Happy Birthday to him at church on Sunday, but all in all I think he came out of it ok. We went and stuffed ourselves with wings and brownies at TJ's in Brampton while watching the hockey game on the Saturday, and the Leafs won, so it was all good.

2. Truman is having a birthday soon. She is only turning 26, but I think that the move from early twenties to late twenties is sinking in. In fact there was a funny exchange surrounding this upcoming event:

[on the daily walk to Timmy's]
Truman: Oh, I love Grazzie! We shall celebrate here on my birthday.
Colic: Ok
Kef: Ok
[later, back in the office]
Colic: Ok, I'm sending the invitations for your birthday.
Truman: NO! I changed my mind. I don't want a party. No celebrating my birthday.

It's four years from now, but I am dreading her turning thirty...there will be trauma.

3. My Mum pointing out that I am getting to the end of the twentysomething phase of my life. I really don't know why she draws attention to the fact that I am getting older. If I am almost thirty, that means she is...ok I'd better not.

4. Jenn over on her blog has a countdown going to her thirtieth. Right down to the minute! I don't think she has to worry though. She still plays video games and bubble wraps her dog and calls it art. I admire the young at heart.

5. I am reading a book about a girl that turns thirty. It is a girl book, (written by a girl, about a girl, for girls to read,) and there is no sane reason that I, (a boy,) should be reading it except that I must, in order to win an argument with Colic. More on this later probably. (No, I am not telling you what book it is.)

So not only is it getting older, but it is turning or approaching thirty that seems to be in the forefront lately. Obviously a function of being this age and having a bunch of friends this age. Hopper did it a couple years back, the Roomy a couple weeks back, JWE is next, (some time in Q1 but I will not say because I always get it wrong, usually exactly one day late.)

Getting older is a fact of life that I have no control over and honestly it doesn't bother me. At least not consciously. Maybe something in my sub-conscious is screaming in terror at the approach of the big three-oh. I doubt it though. Usually I forget how old I am and have to do the math from this year to my year of birth.

Now all I have to do is forget how to do math!

All for now,
Kef...

Consumes the sky

2005-10-17T20:07:00.000-04:00

Fire

Consumes the sky

Compelled to leave

Enraged by the eviction

The Sun sets ablaze its daytime abode

Clinging to the sky

One last affectation

Bold colours as if to say

"You will remember me"

(Photo by Giggles with my camera...I was driving ;) )

Bad Jokes Volume II

2005-10-13T22:19:00.000-04:00

Because I know how much you all enjoyed the last round of Bad Jokes, I have decided to entertain you with (read: subject you to) some more of my incredible, yet simple, sense of humour.

This time the theme is:

ELEPHANT JOKES!

Q: How do you know there is an elephant in your refrigerator?
A: Footprints in the butter

Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your refrigerator?
A: You can hear them talking

Q: How do you know there are four elephants in your refrigerator?
A: Their Volkswagen is parked out front

Q: How do you get four elephants in a Volkswagen?
A: Two in the front, two in the back

Q: What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill?
A: Here come the elephants

Q: What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill with sunglasses on?

wait for it...

think you got it?

A: Nothing. He didn't recognize them

Booya! That's right! Can I get a *GROAN* from the Eastside?

Tell these to all your friends. Then, if they haven't left you for better joke telling friends, and they ask you, "Where did you get all those awful jokes?" you can tell them it was this crazy man:

Gotta go get the elephants out of the refrigerator.

All for now,
Kef...

Happy Turkey Day!

2005-10-10T22:11:00.000-04:00

I don't like turkey.

Why is turkey the official food of Thanksgiving? Being Thanksgiving up here in Canada this weekend, I had turkey twice in the last two days. Why do so many people like turkey. Maybe people don't actually like turkey at all and they just all eat it because of tradition and nobody has the guts to stand up and say, "I don't like turkey!" like me.

Maybe it's just because I don't like gravy. I don't like the idea of pouring thickened meat juice over my plate of food just to make it edible. You see, I think turkey is dry. It is just a big ol' dry chicken. An overgrown bird that you need to make moist enough to eat again by pouring liquid on it. Kinda like astronaut food.

I mean, I like the rest of Thanksgiving. I like yams and veggies and potatoes and rolls and stuffing, (and let's face it, you don't really need to stuff anything in order to get stuffing,) and pie and coffee and apple cider.

But, I think the only reason we eat turkey is because some ancestors of ours needed to be efficient with the feeding of all the people at this gathering they decided to have, so they had to kill something big. A hard working man can eat half a chicken easily, but you'd be hard pressed to find a family of four that could finish off a turkey and all the fixins in one sitting.

I say we end the years of needlessly bowing to tradition and eat what we want for Thanksgiving. Have a ham, or a roast of pork, (which is quite good stuffed incidentally.) Have a roast beef. Have a chicken. Heck, have a lasagna! Then have your pies, (apple, pumpkin, lemon meringue, plum, etc.) Then have your coffee, tea and apple cider. Then have your hours into the evening filled with comments of how full you are and how good it all was and how you could probably have just a sliver more of pie.

I am not saying you shouldn't have a feast, but eat what you want. Eat what you like. Stand up for your right to feast on your favourite at this autumn harvest holiday.

Join me in saying "I don't like turkey!" and united we can change Thanksgiving forever.

You people in the States still have time for this year.

All for now,
Kef...

(p.s. I appreciate the effort of those, (one being Mum,) that made Thanksgiving dinner for me this year. I have nothing against you as you are currently bound by tradition.)

Comments? Complaints? Bad Jokes?

2005-10-07T23:10:00.000-04:00

I came across an email correspondence between a few of my bandmates a couple days ago and something struck me as funny. Pace had sent a note about some practice or gig that we were preparing for, (probably aXis,) and she ended her note with:

"Comments? Complaints? Bad Jokes?"

Less than five minutes later, Beast had replied with this:

"Darts is a game, not a sport. I hate drivers that change lanes without signaling. Two guys walk into a bar...you'd figure the second one would see it."

It was at this point I decided I might need new friends. I reconsidered however, as who else would appreciate my sense of humour? Well, I'm sure I could find someone...

Anyway, without further ado, for your laughing, (read: groaning) enjoyment...

BAD JOKES

This week, thanks to the Neurotic One, we have a theme.

Q: What do you call a guy that lies on the front step?
A: Matt

Q: What do you call a guy that hangs on the wall?
A: Art

Q: What do you call a guy that floats in the pool all day?
A: Bob

Q: What do you call a guy in a hole?
A: Phil

Q: What do you call a guy beside a hole?
A: Doug

Q: What do you call a guy in a pile of leaves?
A: Russel

Q: What do you call an Irish guy that bounces off the walls?
A: Rick O'Shea

Q: What do you call an Irish guy that hangs around in the back yard?
A: Patty O'Lantern

And, my new favourite thanks to JWE...

Q: What do you call two guys who hang out in the window?
A: Kurt and Rod

Booya! Come on, tell me you didn't laugh at that one, (or at least shake your head in disbelief.)

Next time, Elephant Jokes!

All for now,
Kef...

It's a bunch of teenagers...RETREAT!

2005-10-04T22:27:00.000-04:00

We took the SWAT group away for the weekend. We went to Crief, which is south of the 401 near Guelph.

I love being a youth leader. And, it is especially easy when you have such a great group of kids. This group of teenagers are really good. They don't get into too much trouble, they listen to us when we talk to them or ask them to do something, and they let us have fun with them. It makes it so much easier when you don't get treated like you are so much older than them that they don't want to have anything to do with you. Don't get me wrong, they bring up the fact that I am almost 30, but they do it as a joke over the latest Coldplay or Metric CD. (It helps that I like a lot of the same music as them.)

I'll tell you though, as each year goes by and I get another year farther away from high school, I notice it more. I can't run around all day, then sit in from of the fire until 1am, then chat until 2:30am, then get up to cook breakfast at 7:30am and not seriously pay for it on Monday. I am hurting these first couple of days of the week.

We had campfires both nights. We played football, leaders and girls versus the guys. Our team cleaned up, but it may not have been too fair considering some of the girls play on the school flag football team. We played a "capture the flag" type game in the brush at night, leaders versus students. That was loads of fun, especially when I could hide behind a small tree in the pitch black of night then jump out at the kids when they came by me. Some of the reactions were priceless! We ate good food, (too much, too often it seemed.)

And, we spent four good chunks of time watching these Nooma videos that Rob Bell from the Mars Hill church down in the States put together, then discussing them in groups. We talked about such things as what we want and what God gives us, revenge and forgiveness, and if we really need to go to church on Sunday. I am continually amazed when working with youth at the depth of thoughts going through a teenager's mind, and the amount that I learn from them when it is supposed to be them doing the learning.

I love these guys, (and yes some of them read this and I don't care if they know it.) There is something about building into the lives of the young people in this world that just feels right. I'll keep doing this as long as I can and as long as they'll have me.

Lets just hope it doesn't kill me while I am still young...

All for now,
Kef...

Everyone Loves a Parade

2005-09-28T00:55:00.000-04:00

Yes, that is me with Mario Andretti! This was one of my highlights from this year's Products Parade.

But Kef, what is this Products Parade of which you speak?

My first response to that is who are you? None of my friends' grammar is that good. Next response is to describe it to you.

Every year the Tire has a Dealer Convention. This is where each of the Associate Dealers of our some 500 stores gather in one city for meetings, fun, etc. Part of this event is the Products Parade. I and the rest of Team 188 come in here.

Each buying team is responsible for several booths at this trade show type gathering. They can bring in vendors, product displays, or new store merchandising ideas for the Dealers to look at. Now if you have nothing to do with retailing, then you are probably bored already, so I will quickly move on.

My part, and the part of the rest of my team, was to get ready for the show, then man the booths. Tuesday and Wednesday were setup days then Thursday and Friday we were on. The best part about the week was the funny stuff that I and my team got into, and the funny pictures I got of a lot of this happening. The last post shows some of the fun of the setup days. Colic will never live down that "smile" if you can call it that.

Other highlights included:

The "one hour" mid-day trip back to the office.
Truman (on the cell): You seen Colic?
Harrison: Colic is MIA!

The morning stop at Timmy's.
Colic (on the cell): TRUMAN! We love you! So... We were wondering... since we're coming to get you... if you wouldn't mind... maybe... if you have time...
Truman: Colic. Tell me what you want before I strangle you through the phone.

The cool stuff they had at the show. That is a real Orange County Chopper.

The chics hanging out on the cool stuff they had at the show.

Relaxing with the freebies near the end of the show.

Or, just relaxing in general at the end of the show.

This is Stewie, our current co-op. His name isn't really Stewie, but Colic thought he looked like a Stewie, so that is now his name.

We can celebrate with friends that we made it...

After the final tear down.

And it is always good to catch the boss looking confused.

All in all it was a fun, if not slightly stressful week.

And, a few days away from the desk does wonders.

All for now,
Kef...

Maybe I'll just keep watching

2005-09-22T22:53:00.000-04:00

Just got done watching the CSI season premier. Remember how I said how much I love that show and that I was mad at my guidance councilor because I could have been an awesome CSI?

I was wrong.

I think I need to stick to watching the show and not dream about actually having the job. Today while watching the excellent first episode of the season, I almost puked.

**Side note: I contemplated long and hard on what phrase to use there. Puked, threw up, regurgitate, yakked, barfed, lost my lunch, tossed my cookies, whistled beef, did the technicolour yawn... Puked seemed to work, but I need to let you in on the process.

If the visual representation of the scene in question was enough to illicit a gag reflex, then I can only imagine what it would be like to be there...smelling it.

That's all I will say as I don't want to give anything away to those who may have taped, PVRd or Tivod it. I will say though, that "Technically that makes you a cannibal" will go down in history as an instant classic line from this show. And Sara is still hot. (Just needed to point that out.)

In work related news, the Dealer Convention is this week so I have been down at the CNE for most of the week setting up, and then today displaying our booths at the show. There may be some funny stories to tell when it is all said and done. And I may have some funny pictures to go along with those stories. I'll have to be careful with that however, I still have to share the power cube with the rest of Team 188.

Ah heck, how bad could it be? Here are some preliminary favs from setup days!

All for now,
Kef...

The Wedding Singer?

2005-09-18T23:13:00.000-04:00

First off, let me say Congrats to Rob and Erica! I am so happy for the both of you and may God bless you in your new life together.

Yes, I was at another wedding. That's four this year, plus my cousin's next month to make five, plus I missed one as it was the same day as my Sis'. It's getting a little crazy as I have mentioned before. But, I love weddings. The ones with dances are the best because you can catch your friends doing some crazy stuff.

Like dancing:

Sometimes you just gotta shake it I guess.

Oh yeah, that's Kelford. He also likes to sing:

To the ladies...

Of course, sometimes my friends catch me doing crazy stuff too.

But I get them back.

I might not survive this one ;)

All for now,
Kef...

(oh yeah...more photos of the day here)

Have you seen this?

2005-09-17T00:06:00.000-04:00

This is Su Doku. Su Doku is a puzzle. I like puzzles.

Puzzles keep me occupied on the bus to work. Puzzles wake my brain up in the morning when I am in a bit of a fog. Puzzles keep me sharp and force me to think logically.

You'll notice that Su Doku is a number puzzle. I am way better at number puzzles than word type puzzles. There are two reasons for this. I don't think I have that broad a vocabulary, (I use the thesaurus a lot,) and I can't spell. With number puzzles, 3 always comes before 4, 6+8 always equals 14, and there are only 10 digits for me to make any number I could possibly want. With words, there are 26 letters, multiple ways to spell words depending on location, (honour vs. honor,) and "i" definitely does NOT always come before "e", especially after "c".

I've always had a bit of a calculator head or analytical mind. My favourite subjects in high school next to music were math and physics. I was on the Math League team, (it's like Reach for the Top but math only,) and the Science Olympics team, and even in band I could tell how far out of tune someone was by counting the beats of the offset frequency vibrations. Wow I was a nerd!

I guess I still am a nerd because these puzzles really keep me occupied. I mean, head down nose in the book don't talk to me occupied. Just ask me how many transit stops I've missed since I got this book.

Three. In two days. Twice on the same trip.

Monday at lunch I picked up a book of Su Doku puzzles from the local Indigo. Good deal, only $4! Well, my ride home consists of two subway stops and a 25 minute bus ride. When I was on the train, I didn't even look up until I had finished one puzzle and noticed the doors were closing on stop three of two. At this point I actually considered going to the end and riding back, (only two more stops north, then three back.) I rushed the doors though and made my way to my bus.

On the bus the tunnel vision returned. Again, I looked up only as I finished a puzzle and thought to myself as I looked out the window, "Hey, there's the pizza place I like. Funny, I thought that was two stops past the bus stop for my apartment." It is. So now I had a fifteen minute hike back to the apartment. Just enough time to get into another puzzle right? I got a little bit smarter at this point and put the book away. Otherwise I'd probably end up as a hood ornament as I crossed the street.

So I learned my lesson right? Nope. Next morning I get out the book while on the bus. Luckily the bus route ends at the subway station and I have to exit to go to the train. The subway stop I need however has less distinction. I almost trampled an old lady when I lunged at the doors.

I drove to work today. Don't worry, the book's at home.

All for now, Kef...

Loooonnnngggg meeting

2005-09-16T01:24:00.000-04:00

The after meeting meeting of the board meeting I was just at was good. But that means the length of the night was not good.

Too tired. Even my vocabulary is not good. Talk to you all tomorrow.

All for now,
Kef...

I'm at a place called Vertigo

2005-09-13T22:59:00.000-04:00

Monday was supposed to be a good day. I know this sounds weird for a guy that works an office job, but there is a very good reason that I will explain in a minute. I was on my way to work, driving my car as there was somewhere I needed to be after work, when I encountered a problem:

MY STUPID CAR BROKE AGAIN!

(note: if you can't believe this actually happened or are tired of me complaining about my car, you can skip ahead to here "******" to hear about the good part of the day)

BAH! Driving along Eglinton, (a main street in T.O.) trying to make the shift from 2nd to 3rd gear, and the clutch gets stuck. And this is not just the "slow release on a cold morning" stuck. This is a "someone put a block of wood under the pedal" stuck. Luckily I have some momentum and I can get on to a side street. I force the car out of gear to prevent a stall and proceed to try the clutch again. When I press down I hear a "click" which was probably more like a "ka-snap" and then the pedal is free. Free as in not actually moving the clutch any more, just swinging free under my left foot.

Naturally my first reaction is to laugh. But it wasn't an amused bit of laughter, it was more the insane cackle of a madman. I think I may have scared a girl walking to school. Next action was to call the dealership to ask them what they screwed up when they put it back together last time. He can't figure what it might have been, but offered to pay for the tow back to the shop.

******
So I am back on the bus and off to work to make plans for the after work portion of this day because I will not let this trouble ruin what I have in store for the evening.

Monday was the day I had tickets to U2 at the ACC!

That's right, I went to the first of four shows of the Vertigo tour here in Toronto. As always, the good old Irish boys did not disappoint. They came out with Vertigo of course, then came right back with I Will Follow. One of the latest hits, and one of their first. They really know how to play to the crowd that spanned ages from 8 or 9, to those into their sixties or more. The crowd that I went with was a bit like that. Me, The Roomy, Katie, Giggles, Warren (the girls' Dad) and Tim (their Uncle.)

All night they rocked out a good mix of the new and old, sometimes changing them up a bit, and other times just letting us all sing while they listened. They brought back some favourite memories of mine by coming out for the first encore, Bono dressed as he was back on the Zoo TV tour and playing Zoo Station. Then, they nearly brought me to tears with an acoustic rendition of Yahweh, my personal favourite from Atomic Bomb.

All around it was a great show, and I know why I keep going back whenever they are in town. Even when we got in the van at the end of the night to rehash the best moments, and lament the fact that they didn't play Mysterious Ways, we know that we witnessed a group of masters at work. A group of men that have made it their business to move us in more ways than one with their chosen craft. A group of men that have, and will, continue to bridge age, race, and gender gaps with their brand of entertaining. A group of men that I can wake up the next morning and feel comfortable, if not a little proud of sharing with others the fact that I saw U2 live.

This morning was tough. DiPede was there and we wanted to talk about the show, but Colic was mad that she couldn't go. She seemed angered by something I did, too. I mean I thought I was being thoughtful by calling her voicemail from my cell during Sunday Bloody Sunday to let her hear.

It might take a Timmy's or two to make up for that one...

All for now,
Kef...

More from the office

2005-09-11T22:56:00.000-04:00

Time for the Tire Moment of the Week!

This week goes to Truman again. She was having a rough day Friday. Her shoes that looked like they should have been comfortable were hurting her feet, things were not going her way, and I guess her lunch kinda got away on her. I'll play it out for you.

Scene: At the Subway at lunch. Kef, Colic and Truman decided they needed to get away from the desks for a little bit. We had finished lunch and were getting to the point we should head back...
Truman: I have to go to the bathroom. [stands up]
Truman: My foot hurts. :(
Truman: And there's lettuce on my chair. :(
Truman: And now I'm becoming one of those girls that complains about everything. :(

I couldn't help it. It was kinda cute and it made Colic and me both laugh so it gets the spot this week. There were a couple other moments that were in the running this week and I feel they deserve honourable mentions.

Honourable mention #1: At the start of this same lunch on Friday when we were still deciding where to eat. Standing on the corner of Yonge and Eglinton.
Colic: How about Spring Rolls?
Truman: Meh
Kef: Meh. The bagel place?
Colic: Meh.
Truman: I'm off bagels. (more on that later)
Colic: How about Swiss Charlet? (it's what she calls Swiss Chalet) You guys feel like a quarter chicken?
Kef: ummm...
Truman: ummm...
Colic: You don't have to get the quarter chicken, you could get the kaiser on a bun.
Truman: The kaiser IS the bun.
Colic: [confused look] Oh yeah!

Honourable mention #2: This one stems from a challenge that was put forth to the members of my power cube, by us, so I guess it is basically a self-challenge. Our buying team number is 188. So, we have started the Team 188 Health Challenge. It started as a way to cheer/egg each other on with regard to becoming healthier in our day to day living, instead of just talking like we might at some point get healthy.

The Challenge has the following five rules:

1. Must work out twice / week.

2. Only eat chocolate once / week. (Excluding chocolate milk)

3. Must bring lunch twice / week.

4. Must drink 1.5 L of water / day.

5. Must eat one snack of fruit or vegetable / day at work.

They are pretty simple rules that may seem easy to follow, but we wanted to give ourselves something we could achieve before setting the bar too high. Rule 2 comes from the fact that our team has somewhat of an addiction to chocolate. Mini candy bars, Tim Horton's hot chocolate, etc. But, one of the only things that keeps Truman coming in to work each day is her chocolate milk in the morning, so we decided that it was probably healthy enough to let her have it.

We have each set personal goals for this challenge and are measuring them with a weigh in each Thursday morning. I brought in my scales that give weight and body fat percentage. Now, I can't post what each team member's stats were or the only thing you would be reading from now on would be unfinished manuscripts published posthumously to this blog, but I can tell you what we learned from the first weigh in:

The girls don't need to participate in the Team 188 Health Challenge, only the boys do.

Upon recording each team member's first weigh in, I did some research on body fat percentages and what they mean. DiPede and I have some work to do. The girls on the other hand have a head start, in fact we discovered that Colic is actually in the range they attribute to athletes.

This started a bit of fun with the team. You see, Colic is what you might call, a "girlie girl." Athlete is not the first word that comes to mind when you think of her. For example, earlier in the summer Truman and I were talking about softball which we both play, when I mentioned I got a triple. Colic asked what a triple was. Yes, it may be an honest question and I am not criticizing, but it is not a question an "athlete" would ask.

So, when Colic discovered that she had the body fat percentage of an athlete, she got up and proceeded to "run" around the power cube while singing the Rocky theme. (Bonus points to the first person to tell me the title of the “Rocky Theme” song.) So, except that there wasn't any real dialogue involved in this incident, it might have been this week's Moment.

Now I think I am going to go get this week's chocolate out of the way early.

All for now,
Kef...

Stupid car

2005-09-09T19:39:00.000-04:00

There she is, and she's back on the road. If you've been following along, you'll know I was a little worried about what this was going to cost. All told, it wasn't as bad as I, or several others I know that "know" about cars, thought it might have cost. For instance, when my step-dad heard about the blown engine, the first thing out of his mouth was, "there goes $5000-6000." Yikes. In the end, the following was done:

Engine - out of a wreck, with only 41,000km, which is 63,000 less than I had, ("good news!" the optimist says)
Rad - replaced and filled with coolant of course
Thermostat - new
Timing belt - new
Fan belt - new
Plugs and wires - newer, (the ones in the wreck were better than mine)
Fly Wheel - Machined
Oil change
Transmission fluid changed
3 back recalls completed, (apparently when I moved I stopped getting them)

All for the low low price of $2650.
Plus the original $90.
Plus the time at the Tire $45.
Plus the tow across the city $60.
Final damage $2845.

The guy at my dealership was really good, and did help out a lot compared to what I was quoted elsewhere so it is hard for me to complain too much.
But it still SUCKS! This goes as far as the dreaded Completely Sucks. The farthest down the scale of the Westside Awesomeness/Suckiness scale. BAH!

Oh what I could've done with $2845...
I could've bought my new camera AND two lenses and been well on my way to being a famous photographer.
I could've gone to Sydney and learned how to surf.
I could've seen 167 movies, and had a drink and popcorn, (I hate popcorn, but I could've had it!)
I could've bought 1,085 Starbucks Grande Americanos, 2,473 Twix bars, 28,450 sour keys, or 284,500 gummie bears, all of which would have made me WAY happier then spending that money on my car. Again I say BAH!

What can I do? I guess I'll have to go back to selling used shoelaces for extra cash...

All for now,
Kef...

There is no joy in Mudville...

2005-09-07T23:48:00.000-04:00

Ok, so last week when we had our "last" baseball game I thought that would be it, and I was fine with it. It turns out that there was some misunderstanding regarding the eligibility of a player for playoffs, (read: they had some ringers) so we came to a compromise of a rematch tonight.

So now I have to drag out my glove and cleats again and I am not that excited about it, because as I said before, I was ok with the transition into winter sports happening soon. But I slowly get my psyched up for the game and we go out tonight to better last week's performance.

Getting down 11-0 after three innings was not a good start.

They were hitting me left right and centre. I may have struck out one in the first three innings and they actually got to ten batters in the third, (ten batters is the mercy rule in all but the last inning.) But, in the bottom of three we turned on the bats. We started chipping away at the lead and the defense was holding to three or four batters an inning. When we finally get to the bottom the seventh inning, (last inning,) the game is tied 15-15. We need one run to win the game and get to the next round of playoffs.

First batter strikes out. Second batter gets a single. Third batter a double putting runners 2nd and 3rd with one out. Next batter grounds to the pitcher and they turn to 1st quickly and are ready for the throw back home so now it is 2nd and 3rd with two outs. Next batter is Hopper, a spray hitter that can literally put it anywhere there is green. Pitcher gets one strike then throws four away to "intentionally" walk him. See, you can't walk a guy on purpose to get to a girl batter in this league. The penalty for walking a guy on four straight with no strikes is he goes to 2nd and that would have won us the game. So the pitcher gets the strike then throws four to put him on 1st so they can load the bases and have a force out at each spot.

Their problem was the next girl batter for our team was a chick we like to call Boomer.

When Hopper was being walked, you could see that she was not happy. You could tell that she thought it was a cheap thing to do and I'll bet that she thought they were just trying to get past a guy to have an "easy out" with a girl batter, even though the loading the bases for the last out strategy was sound. You could see her just steaming, itching to show this team what a big mistake they had made putting her up at the plate.

First pitch - perfect strike, just what Boomer wanted. She never takes the bat off the shoulder unless she has a strike against her.
Second pitch - swing right through, line drive to the gap in right centre. Easily a stand up double and the winning run jogs in from 3rd!

Boomer showed them what a big mistake they had made putting her up at the plate.

We won the game and made it to the next round of the playoffs. Well, remember that this was a rematch. This wasn't a planned game and didn't really fit in to the schedule. Guess when the next round of the playoffs was. Right after the game I just told you about.

We lost this game, 17-5, and I don't really feel that any details are worth it. I could make excuses. In fact I will. I was tired. I pitched ten innings all told tonight. My backup was tired too, (even though I think she pitched way better than me the second game.) We were all tired. But they were also a good team...are a good team. We have known the Rebels for years and I always like to play against them. I hope they do well in the next round.

So now I go to bed in pain. Yes, I hurt myself playing baseball, it can happen, and I don't care if people laugh at me at work tomorrow. My hip hurts, my knee hurts, and my hand hurts, all from a single that I never should have even thought of stretching into a double.

It was worth it for the look I got from the coach on 1st!

All for now,
Kef...

Good thing that picture fell behind the desk

2005-09-05T22:02:00.000-04:00

A photo of photos. This is how I decorate. I take pictures of stuff then put it up on my walls to look at. We've been in this apartment for more than a year and a half and this is the first bit of "decorating" that has been done in the main room, (other than the paint which helps a bit.) But until this weekend we had three really big, empty, brown walls.

Now we have two! But it's a start. Heck, I still don't have curtains.

I had a pretty lazy day. But to be honest, I don't feel the least bit guilty about it. I mean, I did some laundry, but that is just going up and down in the elevator a few times. The machines really do all the work. I hung up those photos, but really that was just the hammering of four nails as they were framed more than a week ago, (hurray for procrastination!) I went for a walk, but that was just down to the Pizza Pizza because all I have to eat in the house is frozen breakfast sausages and milk.

The crowning achievement of my day however, was the fact that I watched eight hours of CSI. That's right, other than the walk, and the break to play playstation with a couple of friends that came over, I did nothing but watch Grissom and the team solve the crimes of Las Vegas with their quick wit and the awesomeness of science.

I love this show, and I mean I truly enjoy watching it. It is the only show I make a point to watch each week. In fact it may be the only show I watch other than sports and Sportcentre. It reminds me that science rules, (Thank you Bill Nye.) It reminds me that you can't get away with a crime, (and that makes me feel better.) It reminds me that the guidance councilors at my high school sucked, (I totally could have been a CSI.)

Watching this much of the show I love in one sitting though, has started to remove a bit, (but just a bit,) of the magic. I start to realize where Hollywood steps in to keep us glued to the set hour after hour. Here are a few of examples, and I'll apologize ahead of time if I ruin the experience for any of you.

1. The phone always rings at just the right time.
Not only do the callers wait until the very end of the important conversation that is currently happening, they more often than not provide the key information the CSI was just waiting for. The other side of the coin is when the caller phones at just the right time to bail out the CSI from a conversation that isn't going so well, (like when Grissom has to deal with that egotistical sheriff that moonlights as the President's head of security on 24.)

2. The CSI in Las Vegas sometimes get lucky.
That is the only word I can think of for this one. I'll give you an example. Sara and Grissom are looking at the pictures on the wall of a patient in a mental hospital. They are noticing the dark nature of the art he has created and discussing the origin of the images. One of those nature versus nurture conversations. Sara reaches for one of the drawings and it falls off the wall and behind the desk. To retrieve the lost drawing they move the desk out and this reveals a ventilation grate. Sara tests the grate and it opens easily to reveal what I can only describe as a whack of evidence.

3. Tests and searches happen much faster for the Las Vegas CSI.
When you put a fingerprint in the computer to look for a match, it takes minutes. DNA tests come back while you're still on shift, and almost always with conclusive results. Autopsies are performed immediately and the doctor can always walk the CSI through the most important part so they can help form the conclusion. The Photoshop techs are better than any I have ever seen. Did you know there is a wipe that completely restores a person's face to it's original state?

I still love the show. I just think I need to stick to the one hour a week, (with maybe one or two reruns a week.)

All for now,
Kef...

Tire Moment of the Week

2005-09-03T01:01:00.000-04:00

Remember my work colleagues? Remember the tidbits of wisdom that I get from them and the fun we seem to have. Well we do. To refresh, I share what I call a power-cube, (others might call it a pod,) with Truman, Colic, and DiPede. We started a new tradition this week.

The "Tire Moment of the Week."

It sounds pretty big, and it should probably be the "Team 188 Moment of the Week" but we started it, so we get to name it. This whole thing started with the original Quote of the Now which was, "Autumn is like Sunday." This indescribably brilliant piece of wisdom came from the mind of Colic, but at the time we did not know it was only the beginning. We started to notice that on occasion, the silence, or current conversation, was broken by an astonishing, yet completely random statement by one of us in the power-cube. This moment was usually followed by great pause, then me saying, "I'm writing this down."

And so started the List.

The List is the series of sticky notes along the ledge of my shelf on which is written all of the noteworthy, uncanny utterances. It was decided that at the end of each week, we should choose a favourite from the weekly List. So, at noon today, Friday September 2nd, we made the call on the first ever Tire Moment of the Week.

This one needs a little background, let me set it up for you:

Part 1: Monday morning, DiPede arrives at work and relates the tale of his summer roller hockey team. They spent most of the season in last place but by some miracle, they squeaked into the playoffs, won a series of games, then defeated the best team in the league for the championship. Each player on his team received a medal to commemorate this event. Naturally feeling proud of this accomplishment, he brings the medal in to share with the team.

Part 2: Completely unrelated to Part 1: Truman is preparing for what we call a "Big Think" meeting off site for the remainder of Monday and Tuesday. They will be thinking strategically about her business and basically ripping it apart piece by piece, so of course she is a little nervous.

Part 1 and 2 come together:
Truman: Ok peoples! See you all Wednesday. Off to the big meeting. Wish me luck!
DiPede: Wanna take the medal?
Truman: Yeah Ok! [takes the medal, folds the ribbon, and places in her pocket]
Colic: [bursts out laughing]
Kef: This is going on the list

All week we would come across a moment and wonder if it was the next big one, but every time we did we kept coming back to the fact that Truman took DiPede's hockey medal to the "Big Think" as inspiration.

Some times it's amazing we get so much, (read: anything at all,) done!

All for now,
Kef...